View Full Version : Avoidance or sensible?
I occasionally flick through a copy of one of the tabloids that a work colleague brings in when I'm making the teas. Today, while flicking towards the sport section I caught a headline containing the words "stress" and "heart". I quickly flicked past but I felt a mild spin out.
I've been almost back to normal lately. Get the dizziness and the missed beats a bit but can live with it now. However, I suppose this type of thing was one of my main triggers and I had made a point in recent months of trying to avoid seeing this stuff where possible.
Should I test myself by going back and reading the article to see how I react now or should I avoid it??? I'm not sure if this would be avoidance or sensible??? Sorry if it doesn't seem like a major thing but this is one of my real heavy triggers and I'd love to think I could read it and not go into panic mode.
I don't know what to do. If I'm "cured" then I should be able to read stuff like this surely??
Cheers,
Trev
eeyorelover
27-09-05, 12:23
Hi Trev -
I would think that avoiding anything that triggers your panic is never a good thing. If you will avoid one situation or whatever then you will avoid the next and the next, it becomes a neverending cycle. I would say read it if only to prove to yourself that you can get thru it
good luck :)
Sandy
(eeyorelover)
If the world didn't suck... we'd all fall off :)
I would be getting into a real positive mood before reading it tell your self you can read it and then get on with your day. find as many positive thing's to tell your self before sitting down to read it that way your not thinking about any past bad feeling or thought's. Create a positive frame of mind and you've way there.
I think this is more sensible than avoidance.
For starters, you're not actually avoiding any situations, you're avoiding something that will more than likely make you avoid the situations that are going to help you get through your anxiety.
I know that Meg used to say 'time without incidence is the key to success'. I think this is very true in this case. Reading these articles right now will only fuel your fears giving you greater concern when it comes to exercise.
At this moment in time, you really want to be eradicating all of this negative thought, not fuelling it. Once the anxiety has completely subsided, these articles will have much less affect on you, but for now I would just stick to what you're doing.
<b id="quote">quote:</b id="quote"><table border="0" id="quote"><tr id="quote"><td class="quote" id="quote">I don't know what to do. If I'm "cured" then I should be able to read stuff like this surely??</td id="quote"></tr id="quote"></table id="quote">
From what I hear, you've came a long way and you're doing very well. But it's important to remember that you have some strong memories and associations. Generally you may feel good about yourself and pretty positive about your exercise and all the other stuff that has bothered you in the past, but going back to an article like this will only serve to trigger your memory. When you're dealing with anxiety you're very much re-programming your brain and this takes time. At the moment you're probably still quite vulnerable to these memories and associations. Go back to Meg's phrase, 'time without incidence...', and keep plodding on the way you are. Over time your vulnerability will decrease as your new train of thought strengthens itself.
Think of it like going to the gym. It takes time for you body to adapt and build on itself, but eventually you will get results, it's guaranteed.
You're doing very well as you are, keep going and you'll get the results, it just takes a little time.
Besides that, I generally stay away from the news altogether, that much negativity isn't healthy, especially for breakfast.
mico
'Security is mostly superstition. It does not exist in nature, nor do the children of men as a whole experience it. Avoiding Danger is no safer in the long run than outright exposure. Life is either a daring adventure, or nothing.'
Trev ,
The power of suggestion is ione of the final bits to go....
At some point you have to go for it.
If you're feeling sparkly and positive and well - do it today - if you're wobbly leave it for another day.
Either way be prepared to look at it with critical eyes and take out the facts from the hype. This is not just a newspaper - its a drama indicing paper- that's its job.
Meg
www.anxietymanagementltd.com
Your anxiety is the human representation of the pictures that you paint using your many vivid colours of revolving and reoccurring thoughts.
How big is your gallery ?
Hmmm, you could be forgiven for thinking that my reply contradicts with Meg's, which probably leaves you just as confused.
In some ways, maybe it does, but in many, it doesn't.
<b id="quote">quote:</b id="quote"><table border="0" id="quote"><tr id="quote"><td class="quote" id="quote">If you're feeling sparkly and positive and well - do it today - if you're wobbly leave it for another day.</td id="quote"></tr id="quote"></table id="quote">
I believe this is the important bit. In fact I almost put in a very similar piece of advice in myself.
It's really up to you whether you think you can handle it right now. If you can, then go for it. It'll instill some negative thought into you, but then it's up to you to keep on doing everything you've been doing. You've already been through the worst of it, this is just a test along the way. If you can read this, and then still push through with your exercise afterwards, then you're making big steps again.
It all depends on how much you feel you can take on right now. If you feel you need more time, then leave it for another day and let your confidence build until you're ready.
mico
'Security is mostly superstition. It does not exist in nature, nor do the children of men as a whole experience it. Avoiding Danger is no safer in the long run than outright exposure. Life is either a daring adventure, or nothing.'
Thank you all for your postings.
Mico, very wise words. You gave me great inspiration before and what you say is completely right.
I also made a conscious decision to avoid "news" because it always seems so negative. I suppose as you start feeling like "you're old self" you let things slip back into your life that you were probably better off without anyway!
Meg, thanks, I was hoping you would post on this one. Quote "At some point you have to go for it." In a warped way I was hoping you would say to read it.
On the one hand I agree with Mico's angle in that there is no real benefit in so many ways. However, everyone's trigger is different and we all have to face our own triggers at some stage. I've ticked lots of them off (with major help from you guys) and this would pretty much be the last hurdle, which is why I'm tempted to go for it.
I remember speaking to the lecturer on the Stress Management Course who said that when reading any data you must always remember that for it to be relevent you must recreate the exact same set of controls as was used in the tests. If you don't do this then the data is near meaningless. I can rationalise this when I'm able to think straight but we all know what happens when the fear creeps in!!
I've got a massage booked for later so I'm tempted to read it as I can use that to relax if it all goes pear shaped!
Hi Trev,
An interesting post.
When my anxiety first started I avoided the news, magazines, TV etc etc that had anything to do with mental illness incase this might mean I had some scary mental thing.
Over time I don't do this quite so much.
I watch minimal news, just enough to be aware of current events. I never read a newspaper and I most certainly never read womens magazines (think these are amongst the worse culprits with their ridiculous stories).
I think like the others that, do it as and when you can handle it - there are alot of things I realise I don't need to know about and refuse to keep 'testing' myself in this way. If I want to read it I will but if I don't then thats the end of it.
I did watch Shelley in Coronation Street with her panic attacks and although it did make me a little jumpy now and again I was glad it was in a soap, as it made it seem much more normal. Although I bet in true soap fashion she'll be ok again next week.
Love Piglet :D
Read it just before the massage - good idea!! :D
"If life were simple, word would have got around"
Mico,
I think we were saying roughly the same thing.
When the frame of mind is right - do it, but for this challenge pick your time with care.
It doesn't have to be a JFDI moment.
Meg
www.anxietymanagementltd.com
Your anxiety is the human representation of the pictures that you paint using your many vivid colours of revolving and reoccurring thoughts.
How big is your gallery ?
Well, after considering the advice and my current position, I decided to go for it..........and it was basically a bit of an anti-climax which I'm extremely pleased about! I suppose I was primed to some degree by your comments though.
Very mild dizziness and a slight tension in the throat / upper chest area and that was it. :D Reading this article would have had me spinning big time not so long ago so I'm very pleased.
The content was as you would expect so I'm not going to repeat any of that stuff. It gave no background or detail (not that you'd expect any of that in a tabloid!).
To use Meg's quote..."This is not just a newspaper - its a drama indicing paper- that's its job."....that about sums it up.
Piglet, couldn't agree more about those Womens magazines. They are ridiculous for this sort of stuff in my limited experience of them. (I don't buy them by the way he says back tracking wildly [:I]).
I've had a good think about it and I suppose the root of my problem with these articles in general is the question "Have I done permanent damage?". This keeps popping up in my head when I read that stuff but I suppose I'm asking to know the unknown. Just get on with it and hope for the best. Maybe it's a question that alot of people on here ask themselves, I don't know?
Anyway, the massage was great and I went to the gym as well so a very good day all round I think. [8D]
Cheers,
Trev
"Have I done permanent damage?"
What sort of damage did you have in mind ???
Nice one Trev today .. Good to see you so well
nomorepanic
27-09-05, 22:13
Trev
Well done on coping and reading it and getting through it!
I bet the massage was wonderful as well!!
Nicola
"Nearly all happiness comes into our lives through doors we don't even remember leaving open"
"What sort of damage did you have in mind ???"
I just imagine that I may have sowed the seeds of some future problem. I suppose it's the imagination again but I tend to think of subtle stuff like "I may have slightly hardened my arteries" or "maybe it's caused my cells to be affected by the bad chemicals and they will be storing up for some future cancerous disease".
Now I'm writing it, it seems silly I suppose. Maybe that's what you wanted me to realise Meg??!!!!
Nic, thanks the massage was great. I hope you are feeling better. They're not hollow words, if I can do something practical to help please let me know. You take some quality time to yourself and enjoy some pleasent stuff. You deserve it.
I'm glad you read it and even more glad you got threw it for every chalange we over come we the next one get's a little easyier at least that is how i like to think about it.
I very BIG well done and keep on trying from me if that dosen't seem silly for what eva reason.
Just following all the message's and seeing you get threw it has help me in some way and i just wanted to say thankyou.[8D]
<b id="quote">quote:</b id="quote"><table border="0" id="quote"><tr id="quote"><td class="quote" id="quote">
I just imagine that I may have sowed the seeds of some future problem. I suppose it's the imagination again but I tend to think of subtle stuff like "I may have slightly hardened my arteries" or "maybe it's caused my cells to be affected by the bad chemicals and they will be storing up for some future cancerous disease".
Now I'm writing it, it seems silly I suppose. Maybe that's what you wanted me to realise Meg??!!!!
<div align="right">Originally posted by Trev - 27 September 2005 : 22:45:24</div id="right">
</td id="quote"></tr id="quote"></table id="quote">
I think when you first posted about these issues you came up with these same questions. If I remember rightly, throughout your years you've fluctuated between a healthy lifestyle and a pretty normal lifestyle. I think I commented on this then too.
All in all you seem to have had a fair share of exercise over the years which has got to stand you in a good position. Your average person gets very little exercise in this day and age so you may be surprised at how fit you actually are.
I suggest you find something to occupy your mind with when these thoughts pop up. They are only caused by anxiety. So if you can, try to rationalise them, but don't bother fighting with them. If they're looking for a fight, try to distract yourself with something to take you away from these thoughts.
Tackling the anxiety helps to take away negative thoughts, but also tackling the negative thoughts helps to stop fuelling the anxiety.
I hope this makes sense, it's late [|)]
mico
'Security is mostly superstition. It does not exist in nature, nor do the children of men as a whole experience it. Avoiding Danger is no safer in the long run than outright exposure. Life is either a daring adventure, or nothing.'
Mum2four, glad to hear that you are making progress and getting benefit from the posts.
Mico, you do hit the nail on the head (again!). Yes it does make sense. I think your memory of my plight is better than mine to be honest!! I suppose I've overcome alot of my problems by bashing through them (with help) and not always accepting them 100% i.e. changing my behaviour before the thoughts. This has brought me to my current position where I suppose the root issue, that has been prolonging my anxiety, has been fully exposed. It always seems to lead back to "Have I done myself damage?"
You are right. I've probably done my fair share of exercise compared to some and although I've had a good look at the partying and excess side it's probably nothing when compared to others. (I always think Mick Jagger seems to be doing alright and I doubt he took it easy in the 60's and 70's!!).
No, I think all things considered, I'm there really. As you suggest, the reaction to this question will dull over time I'm sure (yesterday was a good example I suppose). I have taken on distractions such as yoga and playing the guitar which has really helped and the exercise has also really helped I think. The dizziness comes and goes and the odd thought does still creep in but my reaction to them all is basically OK now.
Thanks again for your helpful comments.
Cheers,
Trev
You've been listening and reading about that long term stress causes long term problems..
Some of that is directly related to a raised blood pressure. Yes , there is no doubt that a continually raised blood pressure causes long term problems
Cortisol can increase cholesterol
SSRI's can add weight
It is also true that similarly to stopping smoking, as soon as you stop putting yourself at further risk, the benefits kick in and within some finite time you have reversed the risks altogether.
Trev, often we come out of anxiety a healthier person than we went in due to better self care, some self awareness and an altogether healthier lifestyle.
Get an MOT done one day maybe in 2006 and see if there is anything that you need to work on, but I have every confidence that you have not sustained any long term damage from this.
Meg
www.anxietymanagementltd.com
Your anxiety is the human representation of the pictures that you paint using your many vivid colours of revolving and reoccurring thoughts.
How big is your gallery ?
"You've been listening and reading about that long term stress causes long term problems.. "
That's EXACTLY what I have been doing Meg but I didn't want to say it for some reason. I don't know if it was to "protect" me or not wishing to bring it up on this site for the sake of others, but yes, that's the bottom line on this thought, 100%. This is the stuff that I avoid where possible and that spins me out.
I've only taken 25mg Beta Blockers between Dec and March and I know from your CD's that they are not SSRI's.
BP is ok I believe.
Don't know about cholesterol. I had a load of blood tests done around January but I don't know if they tested for that. In fact I don't really know what they tested for. They just said all was ok. (It did find I had Gilbert's syndrome but I believe that this is harmless).
What can you do to cut cholesterol as a precautionary measure? I did look on the net but I gave up after a few sites as all the leading text was doing me in!
I will get an MOT done next year as you suggest.
I'm sure you are right though and all will be fine.
"Trev, often we come out of anxiety a healthier person than we went in due to better self care, some self awareness and an altogether healthier lifestyle."
As you say Meg, my lifestyle is probably alot healthier than before. I have also become alot more aware of things that I never used to even consider or know about. It's been an eye opener that's for sure and it's made me view mine and other people's behaviour in a whole new light. Still find it utterly incredible that you are not taught about this stuff at school. It would save alot of problems for alot of people. (Much more useful than how to bisect a line armed only with a compass and a shatterproof ruler that's been broken in half!)
Thanks again Meg.
Trev x
I think "Fear of" and avoiding anything associated with us being made scared plays a large part in anxiety, when i first got PD i eventually became recluse scared to step out my door through fear i would have an attack on the street or get run over, struck by lightning, my car sat on my drive for 8 months! I got alot of help from friends family this website here anywhere i could. Over the last year i have decided to confront anything that makes me scared as to prove to myself its all just negative thoughts images/videos you play over in your mind sooo much that your brain gets taught to associate it (gives that memory a reference associated with being scared) with "having an anxiety attack which would lead to dieing" How confused was i! Originally i would sit in my car with these negative thoughts streaming through my head and felt like i had 200 scary movies showing all at once until i started to get so bad i had to run indoors! Only recently have i decided to just face every fear even though im going to have a PA its better than sitting at home and worrying lets face it, we fear having a PA and we sit at home worried incase we do.. It werent until someone said to me so what if you do whats the worse that can happen! With reading the news, your editing your memory/reference point that you have been afraid of for so long, because maybe once we read a paper saw something we didnt like and starting fearing the worse, our brain associates that as danger and stay away as it dont know the difference between real life danger and what we think... tell yourself,, nothing can happen from reading it so what real true physical effect could it possibly have on me! Only the fact i worry about it which informed me i must be in control because i can turn it on, so, i must be able to turn it off!! which gave me a very good feeling that it was actually me in control not someone sticking pins in a voodoo doll or that i was living the sins of my father. or having a Heart Attack or punishment i deserve for a previous life i must of been flard the impaler or something lol. So Basically we teach ourselves to associate any scary feelings or thoughts with p.d and purposely avoid them in fear we have a PD confronting fears is how i have learnt to feel better about myself and built up Self Asteem feelign stronger faced more fears.. I mean, i used to get PA swimming in the swimming pool abroad because i was scared of sharks! seems stupid but i spent the whole time in the water looking around my legs for this sudden fast moving shadow.. what the heck is a shark doing in a 15 swimming pool? i could kick myself sometimes[:o)] ok, im off scuba diving in the great barrier reef![:o)]
april tones
24-03-06, 21:33
hi, i know exactly this situation! have been there many times! years ago and recentty
last yr with bird flu scare i was a mess! if i saw any thing any where i would seek reassurance! i would feel sick,dizzy, ahve a spin and tense up!
now i can read every thing on it!
i got over it!
but i have missed beats and read stuff! that didnt help! that made me worse x
fibrochat) http://apriltones.proboards54.com
I think we will all have experienced the avoidance tactics. It is only natural for anyone and it is so much more highlighted in how we feel, thats why we are more sensitive to it. I guess that people who dont suffer from anxiety would never question it.
But we are here to test ourselves to the limit in whatever or however we feel, to me i see it as part of the illness.
Love Sal xx
Dont mess up the best things in your life, just because at present you are unsure who you are.
"Life is a distance and to travel that distance you were given the strength and guidance to do so".
Hi,
I have a similar fear of seeing blood in case it makes me feel faint.
I have tested my fear by forcing myself to look at blood and I have found that I don't react as badly as I think I will. The fear of how I might feel is worse than how I do feel when I see it (hope that makes sense). I still feel squeamish when I see blood but I can handle it and I don't worry about what will happen if I do see some anymore. I would encourage you to face your fear, but only when you are ready, and in small steps.
Good luck.
Love shoegal xxx
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