No More Panic > Blog > Darrens Story

Darrens Story

September 1996 I had my first panic attack I had just split up from my girlfriend, that night I had my first attack. I remember feeling dizzy and my vision went blurred. Time seemed to stand still my breathing went shallow, I thought I was going to die. That moment my ex girlfriend knocked on the door and punched me in the face shouting and swearing at me. My hearing was buzzing I could not understand what she was saying to me. She turned around and kicked me in the shin and walked out

…I was laying on the floor I thought to myself "this is it I'm going to die" I phoned 999 I was still shallow breathing my body was numb . The ambulance took me to hospital were I was checked over & told I had just had a panic attack and then told I would be ok , So there I was stuck at hospital 7 miles from home with no money on me at 3.am I phoned a taxi and explained my situation, The taxi took my home, I got out of the car and noticed my front door had been boarded up, The taxi was still waiting for his money which was in my boarded up home the taxi driver told me to get back in the car, He then took me to the police station he wanted me to be charged We sat in a waiting room for 1 hour were I was told by the police that I had been broken into and the council had boarded up my house, The council would fix my door at 7am ,the police then drove me home, I had to sit outside my house from 4 till 7 , That is when everything hit me I just broke down crying, I didn't even no what a panic attack was, I was scared of everything my vision my breathing, my numb arms. Everything was so strange, sat there waiting to get in my house I felt so low and scared, I wanted to get in my home to safety but I was trapped outside only now do I realise the significance of that night and how my agoraphobia & panic attacks started I am sure you agree that was a lot to cope with in one night even now I find it all a little surreal, well that's how it all started. Darren