This is a continuation of my [Link removed invalid url] thread.
I’m starting a new thread because the last one was taking ages to load.
Fee: I have been trying to remain in control but control to me is being able to restrict and starve myself so that I can lose weight. I know everyone else wants me to eating small amounts at regular intervals but I can’t do it. I lose control and binge and then feel the need to punish myself because I am so ashamed and hate myself so much.
I don’t think the bloating will ever stop. It just keeps getting worse. I even feel bloated when I drink but am not able to restrict fluid because I am so thirsty all of the time. I don’t think even I am stupid enough to add dehydration to my current problems anyway.
Yes, I too would like to be able to do those things (except the cream tea!) and have other goals I would like to achieve. I would like to get well enough to meet K and have our planned lunch but it looks impossible to me right now. Getting through the next day is too much of a challenge.Quote:
<b id="quote">quote:</b id="quote"><table border="0" id="quote"><tr id="quote"><td class="quote" id="quote">I want to be healthy one day and strong and eventually go for my walk in the hills with lisa and you and piglet and smile and laugh at how far we have all come!! So many issues, driving alone, walking up hills and even for me the cream tea is a bit of a challenge!! (don't panic you can just have the strawberries lol!!!). I want to feel well one day and enjoy life (before i really AM too old lol!) and I know you do too, which is why you keep fighting with it !</td id="quote"></tr id="quote"></table id="quote">
I hope you’re not feeling more anxious and have slept well. I would go to bed and try to sleep if I could stop rushing to the toilet long enough.
Hannah: Thanks for your reply. I have tried to go cold turkey with the laxatives but that didn’t work either. I’m only suffering so much tonight because I have essentially taken two overdoses of laxatives in the past 24 hours. The first lot I took last night was part of my planned reduction programme, but then I panicked this afternoon and took another lot. So it’s my own stupid fault that I feel so ill tonight.
Regarding Annie, I don’t think I will ever find her less intimidating and, for once, it isn’t only me. Other patients have said they feel a bit like this with her too. I can usually tell who I will feel comfortable with, or not, as the case may be. I know I won’t feel able to fully confide in her because I am basically scared of her.
Sue: Good to hear from you. Thanks for the information regarding your sister and what the doctor said. Was she using a lot? Did she get off them? It seems that I’ll never be able to get off them now.
Figs are fairly high calorie compared with other fruits and I don’t think I would be able to eat them. I know I am my own worst enemy.
I feel so ill tonight and have been running to the toilet for hours now. The stomach cramps are horrendous and I felt like I was going to pass out at one point but that’s passed now. I haven’t been able to eat obviously and in some ways, well all ways really, this makes me feel good that I haven’t consumed any calories. Tomorrow is the weigh-in and I am so scared I have gained weight again. I can’t carry on like this.
Karen
Nothing tastes as good as thin feels