Help !
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Any therapists here?
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Help !
---------- Post added at 18:44 ---------- Previous post was at 18:43 ----------
Any therapists here?
Sorry hun but I'm not quite understanding your post??
Are you are sufferer of pure O and are having intrusive thoughts ??
We aren't therapists here, we are all sufferers of various kinds of anxiety, so we help and support each other :)
Your not a pedophile.. Pedophiles are not scared or anxious of having unnatural thoughts, they enjoy them. They don't post on forums like this one either.
Stormsky I know you said that before. I wonder however if there is indeed a sub category of pedophiles who actually are afraid. If I see pretty little girls I have an impulse to touch them my therapist said that is still OCD. How it seems like an attraction?
Then I had another therapist say I had pedophile OCD backed by attraction. What the heck does that mean.
I am so tired of being afraid. I have had these impulses since I was 8. This is so old, I hate it.
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Why did you erase your last post Stormsky?
I haven't deleted any postsQuote:
Originally Posted by Raven1
Raven it's so hard to tell over an internet post. The thing is, if you feel disgusted by these impulses then it's not attraction. If you have a therapist they should be helping you ok, see what they tell you to do about it.
Surely the way to tell the difference would be if you actually have real, physical sexual fantasies about this? If it's just thoughts than lots of people have intrusive thoughts that are very alarming to them. But if you (*sorry to be explicit*) do things like pleasure yourself over these thoughts then that, to me, indicates a real sexual attraction.
This is just my opinion, I obviously know nothing about this and hope I haven't said anything to make you feel bad. I think a therapist is really the best person to advise.
No I don't pleasure myself to that stuff because that's bad.
Hi Raven, I hope I didn't say anything to upset you. I understand this must be very distressing for you to have to deal with and don't want to add to your stress and confusion.
No , you didn't say anything to bother me. I just don't understand why me. Why do I have to have these bad urges. I have never done anything but it doesn't me not afraid i wont. I have had at least 20 therapist/ docs/ social workers say I am not a pedophile. I never believe them. So today I contacted a sex offender therapist. I never have acted so technically I am not an offender but I guess I will get some answers. If he says I am not I will be so happy. I have struggled with this since age 8. I am so over it.
I honestly don't know. I have told my therapists every sick thought, impulse, what I felt like was attraction and they said it was OCD. I asked my last therapist how having an impulse when I see a pretty kid could possibly be OCD. She explained why but I just don't buy it.
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I am so silly youknow what I have seen so many therapists I forgot that one of my therapists consulted a sexual offender therapist in the county and he said I wasn't a pedophile. Still I can't believe it. I am still scared. I have had electric shock therapy for depression so I tend to forget things.
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My husband said I won't rest until I feel like the worst person alive.
Hi Raven
Hope I can help you out here with your thoughts, it's a kind of self hate thing going on, I get intrusive thoughts not about touching children, mine are that I am mental, I am not mental I have been to therapists, I have anxiety with intrusive thoughts, it's your self esteem that is at an all time low that is making you think the worst of yourself, you are trying to destroy yourself with these thoughts, you need to build on your self esteem and gain some self love for yourself, you are a worthy human being.....peadophiles don't have guilt or worry about their thoughts they act on them.
Hope this helps
Reeny
Exactly. I am very angry with God for making me this way.
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I don't want to die I am afraid of hell but if I harm I will go there. So angry!!!!
I'm a staunch atheist too but if you're a believer shouldn't you be able to find solace and love in your religion?
Yeah but don't u deserve hell if you harm?
You havent harmed anyone Raven, and it sounds like you have a very shallow understanding of Christianity.
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or whatever religion
Why do you say that?
Actually I have great doubt about whether God exists. My pastor said I have a choice to make believe he doesn't and if hell is there i indeed go. Or believe and if I am wrong lose nothing. He said I have to chose to believe and one day I will and be able to go to heaven if it indeed exists. My thing is we can't know for sure he doesn't so why not believe he does and if it stops me from harming that's just an added bonus.
I suggest you all keep to topic on this one. Everyone is entitled to different views on religion and this sort of discussion invariably ends in an argument on this forum.
Please agree to disagree and move on.
Pip
Steveo why have you deleted your comments I thought you had some valid points. I think you need some guidence Raven, you are living in fear at the moment and Christianity is so much more valuable than that. I hope you find some peace and it's worth mentioning these deeper worries to a therapist.
I deleted them as I digressed into religion. I should have kept my views on religion to myself.
I also don't feel I am of any help to this situation. I neither suffer from OCD nor do I understand what it's like to have sexual urges towards children. I also don't fear religious consequences of what we do here on this earth.
I feel I should of stayed out of this and I apologise for bringing my atheist views into here.
I am certainly not angry about it. Anyway I thank you guys for the help. I start therapy next week.
I wish you all the best and hope you manage to sort everything out.
Thanks :)
Raven, best of luck with your therapy. I really hope it helps you achieve some clarity as you sound very confused about your thoughts and your faith. Remember it's up to you alone to decide whether you believe in God, not your Paster and not the people on this forum. x
Thanks :)
Iam certain that your thoughts are just irrational. You have got fears that you are afraid of and I think thats a good thing.
I know of 2 people that have been in prison. Im presuming they didnt have a fear of them thoughts. Im sure they couldnt have cared less what they were doing.
You obviously do.
I wish you well. I feel sure your not the evil person you think you are otherwise you wouldnt be seeking help.