thing, I, hear, 24/7,can, you, relate?

Hi All

I hear the same thing off of different ppl, fiancee, mother....etc and it goes like this.........

"Peter you over think things all the time...just get a grip"

It doesn't help at all and the strange thing about it is my fiancee is 29 has M.S and my Mother is 55 and has suffered more than half her life with anxiety, so my fiancee with Multiple Sclerosis is telling me I'm over thinking and the rest.... which makes me feel inferior or cowardly!! Don't get me wrong I admire her positive attitude

I must have lost control a long time ago and forgot what reality is... When the last time I didn't go a day without thinking I was going to die... When I bring this up what i wrote at top is what i hear so now I bottle it up and suffer afraid to say things because others think it's trivial when it's taking my quality of life from me..... See I even feel selfish saying that considering my fiancee condition, i don't know anymore...... Got G.P tomorrow see what he says.

If anyone could relate I'd be more than grateful... Not tht you're suffering but tht I'm not the only one.

Petesy :-)

---------- Post added at 19:57 ---------- Previous post was at 19:07 ----------

Anyone??? :$

Quote:

---

Originally Posted by Petesy

Hi All

I hear the same thing off of different ppl, fiancee, mother....etc and it goes like this.........

"Peter you over think things all the time...just get a grip"

It doesn't help at all and the strange thing about it is my fiancee is 29 has M.S and my Mother is 55 and has suffered more than half her life with anxiety, so my fiancee with Multiple Sclerosis is telling me I'm over thinking and the rest.... which makes me feel inferior or cowardly!! Don't get me wrong I admire her positive attitude

I must have lost control a long time ago and forgot what reality is... When the last time I didn't go a day without thinking I was going to die... When I bring this up what i wrote at top is what i hear so now I bottle it up and suffer afraid to say things because others think it's trivial when it's taking my quality of life from me..... See I even feel selfish saying that considering my fiancee condition, i don't know anymore...... Got G.P tomorrow see what he says.

If anyone could relate I'd be more than grateful... Not tht you're suffering but tht I'm not the only one.

Petesy :-)

---------- Post added at 19:57 ---------- Previous post was at 19:07 ----------

Anyone??? :$

---

Hey man
You are definitely not losing your mind, you just have an anxiety disorder which is an emotional behavioral condition, you have a very creative mind and too much fear - an emotion! All of this is completely harmless, your thinking about dying because that's just the thoughts which come with the anxiety. If you would like some more information just Private message me :)
I hope I've helped...

Hi Peter, I feel much the same as you. My husband has no arms had two hip replacements and will most likely need full time care eventually, and there is me worrying about what feels like a very real illness, even after I have been given the all clear. Luckily my Dr is pretty cool and understands anxiety and it is a valid illness in its own right. People that don't have it can say you over think things and all sorts of other phrases. If it was that easy to stop we would, wouldn't we!

Thanks for the reply Greggs

Much appreciated btw

I'm 31 and had this since I was 18 phsycological warfare amongst physical symptoms, you're right in what u say but you'd think after all these years I would have a hold of it by now let alone grasp, feeling of existing instead of living it's got to the point were after years of therapy cbt, stress management, acupuncture.....etc, I need answers of some sort but it comes bk to the same one anxiety disorder..

When my partner has been diagnosed with multiple sclerosis and is more positive than I am their's gotta something wrong their, i feel selfish or ashamed telling her how I feel but I suppose that's why I'm on here talking about it :-)

Cheers Greggs I'll keep you updated on how I get on at the docs tomorrow.

Petesy.

---------- Post added at 20:47 ---------- Previous post was at 20:28 ----------

Thanks Sahara

I'm sorry to hear about your husband I truly am, trying to hold it together when your loved one is going through so much is hard, especially when you're worrying for both now.

this is the new one I think I need to grasp but as you said ppl that don't have it's a case of "pull yourself together" "get a grip" etc but these comments you can't really get angry about because your husband, my fiancee are in harsh times!

I don't know about you Sahara but I tend to bottle it up because she's going through enough, but to be honest I think I need a leaf out of her book... positivtey wise.

I wish you all the best and my thoughts are with you S.

Thanks again.

Petesy

Petesy

Hi guys

Went to the G.P and he just told me the same thing, GP's words "over thinking" "trying too maintain a positive attitude is difficult when suffering from an anxiety disorder" I honestly feel their answer for everything is just SSRI's and I ain't happy at all with that it's the ferocity of the anxiety and panic attacks that's making me depressed, so I said no to the meds and he thinks CBT and psychiatric help is needed and to think about taking SSRI's

Not feeling sorry for myself just annoyed. And wanting proper medical attention and they should bring back the way the docs worked with us 10yrs ago maybe more, they had more time actually listened, now it's here's anti depressants Bye!!

Sorry for ranting just angry :@

Hey Petesy,

I can't blame you about an aversion to meds. I see many here that feel the same way or fear taking them. I don't particularly like them but I was on them for about 6 months after my 1st heart attack/bypass for depression. While I didn't care for the way they made me feel (a bit out of it), they did get me over the hump and on the way to healing. Recently I was able to overcome another bout with some counseling and CBT techniques.

You have your hands full with your fiance' suffering form health issues. The thing is, anxiety is a health issue. It's a mental health issue that affects you physically. If you haven't looked into, I urge you to take a look at the free CBT course offered here. It's quite good actually. http://www.nomorepanic.co.uk/showthread.php?t=131665

Don't blow off the meds altogether. They may be the edge you need to get a handle on the Dragon. Best to you and your fiance'

Positive thoughts

I've been there too.. in fact still am to a certain extent. I've had medical issues most of my life, and I refuse to feel sorry for myself but when I feel ill, I feel ill - and because I have so many responsibilities for other family members, some days are a real struggle. I may mention I'm not too good, but I don't go into detail about exactly how crap I do feel, and how I just feel like curling up and crying, so I put on a brave face & get on with things.

It's hard doing that though, all of us need to feel there's at least one person who really gets us, knows how bad we can feel, and how frustrated. I think that's why this forum is so popular - it's a safety zone where we can say everything and not hurt anyone's feelings.

I don't know what to advise you, Pete, it's not easy, but hopefully you'll gain confidence in time and find yourself 'over-thinking' less. It's quite possible that your anxiety issues are a direct result of your wife's illness. Whatever's behind it - just don't be hard on yourself, you're doing the best you can.

Pete,
I think we all overthink. That is really the main part of this disorder. Our minds have evolved to resolve problems and come up with solutions, answers. The problem with anxiety is this doesn't work. In fact the search for the solution is very much the problem.
Believe me, you will never solve the problem with your mind, but I know how hard it is to stop trying.
Acceptance is not something that is done with the mind. It is convincing the mind to do nothing, to drop the subject. It takes a lot of practice and your mind will object for sure but if the thinking quietens a little then eventually so will the anxiety.
This is the aim of meditation.... Training the mind to focus on the here and now... And every time it drifts off to try and solve the disorder and think about the past or future, usually every few seconds, we practice refocusing on something like our breathing.
Phil