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I'm really sorry if this is in the wrong place or if I'm not meant to put this here at all but I don't know what to do.
Everything is going wrong, I've had enough.
I knew my depression was bad but I didn't realise how bad it could get.
I want to die :(
Firstly, you do not want to die. you may feel like it now, but you dont. you will get through this. has anythig happened today or the last few days to make you feel this bad?
if you want to talk about anything, you cna talk here. we all understand x
Quote:
Originally Posted by jen2503
Thanks Jen :) I'm just fed up of living.
Because I can't work I reluctantly claimed ESA (I don't like asking for help) to help me and my OH just live...Not have anything nice, just to live. I was told to claim by myself so I did...started receiving money then it just stopped. We budget everything so now we are barely covering our rent, have almost nothing in the way of food and I have to feed 3 dogs, 1 cat and 5 kittens, as well as me and my OH.
I phoned up to find out why and they said my OH earned too much so switched the claim to a joint one .. fair enough but now I'm being told it's unlikely I will get anything.
It's not fair. I'm not lying about my depression and I don't understand how people can lie to get money yet I'm getting no help at all when I need it. I don't drink anymore, I don't smoke, I don't even have internet (I'm leeching it off a neighbour :blush:).
I don't know how much longer I can go on for because something is always going wrong. I can't just have one peaceful month where I don't have to worry about bills, or keeping the roof I have over my head or when I'm going to eat my next meal.
jen is right, you will come through this, i know that is hard to believe right now, but its true, a lot of people here, will understand how you feel, because they have also felt this way.
keep talking, people here can help support you through this bad spell, or phone the samaratians or someone similar, i think it can really help just talking about how you feel.
P x :hugs:
Are you claiming housing benefit to help with the rent? if you are on any kind of benefit you can claim houseing benefit and council tax benefit. that will then help with rent being paid. i know you dont like asking for help, but its there to help genuine people with genuine needs which you are so dont feel bad. we all need help at some point in our lives, theres nothing for you to feel bad about.
i think its 15grand thats the most you can earn to claim income support or job seekers. if her earns more than that you wont get anything. but you can get working tax credit instead which will help bump his earnings up and you can still claim your housing benefit on top of that to help.
ive been on benefits many times now, when i was a single mum and when hubby was made redundant and its hard to get on them but once you are everything else will fall into place. the most important thing is to get your rent sorted and then the stress of losing your home is gone. then you can focus on feeding you and your family. but if your getting help with rent you will have more left over to live so it should make things alot easier.
Thanks so much both of you :)
I've just been talking to my OH who has told me not to worry but I can't help it.
I've looked into HB but my OH earns £18,500 a year which is his basic rate. I honestly don't think we'll be entitled to anything, especially if I'm refused income related ESA :(