dont understand my anxiety

I have apparently suffered from anxiety/panic attacks for years, but I don't really understand it. I never felt anxious when they first started, I just felt really ill everytime I went out but then I was fine in the house. I didn't go out for 7 months although I did try but it was too hard. Eventually I got the doctor to come to the house and I was put on citalopram which worked wonders, within days I was out and about and I never looked back, after being on them for about 4 years I decided I didn't need them anymore and came off them and all was great for about a year. Then I went to Gran Canaria on holiday with my family and on the morning we were coming home I fainted, I went to the doctor and they put me back on citalopram as before I went on holiday I had a few episodes of feeling ill when I was in shops. that was over 2 years ago and I have just felt awful since then. I asked for my tablets to be changed and they put me on Prozac and that hasn't helped, I feel tired and groggy all the time so have come off them. I am back to feeling ill when I go out. I don't feel anxious so don't understand it at all!!

i think of stress on a spectrum where anxiety is higher up the spectrum and usually comes when the person starts to fear the fear they are feeling.

It would be unusual for your doctor to put you on citalopram or prozac if you weren't showing signs of depression or anxiety. Feeling awful and tired is a 'normal' experience in generalized anxiety disorder. so what you are saying about not feeling anxious is a little at odds at your medication and some of the experiences you have described.

what is your definition of being anxious?

anxiety can be low-level, like butterflies in the stomach, nerves, nauseous, unease or higher-level, panic, hyperventilation, etc.

my definition of anxiety is feeling nervous worried stressed about something, I never had that before, the reason the doctor put me on medication is so that I could go out without feeling ill. I get nervous now, but that's because I am worried about feeling ill!!

that's anxiety right there. fear of feeling uncomfortable feelings!

There is no physical reason why you would feel ill when you go out. It will be due to thoughts about going out.

Gillybean, do you know what it is about being out that triggers you feeling ill? Like, do things look weird, or do you feel strange? Is the light extra bright or sounds loud?