Despair from separation anxiety
I've always struggled to be on my own, to be away from home (I'm agoraphobic),and apart from the people I love and who make me feel safe. However, I've been suffering more than ever since having to be apart from my boyfriend due to work reasons. Whenever he leaves the country for a few weeks, my anxiety worsens and I feel depressed, lonesome, insecure and worried, despite the fact that we message all the time and speak on camera every day.
I'm not worried about him cheating or anything like that because I trust him, I just worry about my own survival, if that makes sense. I realise it sounds odd to those who haven't experienced adult separation anxiety, but it almost feels as if your limbs have been torn off and you're supposed to somehow perform acrobatics without any pain or bother.
I find the stresses of daily life so much worse when I'm on my own. Can anyone relate?
Re: Despair from separation anxiety
I think you could have entrenched abandonment anxiety, Ana. If you're in a stable relationship it would be "normal" to miss your partner, but the insecurity/anxiety you feel is different, and one that you could perhaps explore/discuss with your therapist. I think it's quite common with many anxiety disorders and depression.
Hope you're keeping well, Ana ;)
Re: Despair from separation anxiety
I do talk about it with my therapist. She keeps referring to it as 'adult separation anxiety', hence why I didn't mention abandonment anxiety. :)
My boyfriend knows about it and is always trying to learn more and understand, but at times, it gets really difficult.
I'm keeping well, I think, KK. :) I'm getting on quite well with Seroquel! My depersonalisation has decreased significantly, and my general attitude towards my anxiety is a lot better.
Re: Despair from separation anxiety
Haha, easier said than done, Olivia!
Re: Despair from separation anxiety
I don't know about adult separation anxiety but it sounds to me more like a sense of insecurity and fear that you cannot function unless you are with your partner. Do you feel that you are dependent on him to keep you mentally well?