Not as anxious, but depressed

My anxiety and panic seem to have come right down recently, since I've been doing some proactive relaxation.

However, I've been feeling quite low.

If you can imagine feeling normal and then being a bit depressed, that is how I feel. I don't feel horrendously bad, although I'm still a bit tense, I just feel a bit listless and a bit grim physically.

I'm trying to take it as a very positive step, because I have felt awful with depression and anxiety for years, but it's really hard because I feel a bit like I'm teetering in the middle of a see-saw. I can kind of 'see' being better, but I also know that I could fall into being very unwell again quite easily.

It's so frustrating, because things are starting to go well and there is no reason for me to feel depressed any more.

Ships in harbour are safe..but that's not what ships were built for.

Hi, just take one day at a time, I'm pleased to hear that your anxiety and panic has calmed down because that can make you feel ten times worse as you know. Try not to think negative thoughts because it sounds to me like you are doing so well but as we the experts know, depression does not dissapear over night. The heat isn't going to help the way you feel physically anyway, alot of us feel listless and grim, me for one. Keep up your relaxation methods because they sound like they are helping you which is great.

Take care,

Polly

Hi,

I can relate to how your feeling. When I started to feel better it was like I'd managed to climb out of a black hole. But I also felt like I was balanced on the edge and that it wouldnt take much to make me lose my balance and fall back in again.

I think the road to recovery isnt a straight path (more like a huge rollercoaster!), but I think Pollys right and just concentrate on each day as it happens. You've done really well which is very positive so try to keep that in mind.

I used to (and still do) fall into the trap of all or nothing thinking, where I thought one bad day meant I was back to square one, feeling hopeless, but I'm gradually learning this isnt the case. Each day you fight this youre moving in the right direction, getting stronger. And remember youre never on your own with this.

Dont know if this will help, just my thoughts.

Take care

Coni X

Thanks for your messages.

I really wish that I'd kept a diary, so that I can see how much better I am now than I was.

I know that I AM much better, I don't use beta blockers or rescue remedy anywhere near as much as I used to. I used to get through a bottle of rescue remedy a week (!) now I probably only use it about 4 times per day.

I'm recognising more when I'm having depressing thoughts, although it is still quite hard to turn them round into positives.

I know that my depression is to do with being scared and overawed by so many things. I know that I'm not as scared of people as I used to be. I am associating with positive and inspirational people much more. I know that the way to conquer fear and to become more confident is to face my fears and stretch myself. I knwo now how important proactively relaxing is.

I am quite a competitive person and it's frustrating (depressing) for me seeing people who I know I have as much ability as doing so well and achieving so much, whilst i feel so stuck. I know that that thought is destructive and doesn't help me, but it's the sort of thought that I find so difficult to eliminate and to turn into a positive.

Ships in harbour are safe..but that's not what ships were built for.