negative thinking please help

[tanya 1]

hi all,
i couldnt take my daughter to playgroup this morning because no one was around to help me take her and i just really couldnt face doing it on my own so now im really upset and guilty,i phoned someone that ive had hypnoanalysys with a while ago and he said that im just thinking negative about it and need to think positive but thats easier said than done,god i just fell so stupid and upset, has anyone got any advice for me ?
im just so bloody sick of this.
tanya 1 x

[mummy4]

wish i could advise you hun but as you know im in the same situation as you and its really not nice
x

[willitstop]

Its so hard hun

Ive suffered with this for 7 years now and also suffered from agoraphobia.

you really must say to yourself when you start feeling a panic attack coming i can do this im in control and i will not let you beat me.

its so hard i really do understand what your saying but if you keep letting it rule your life it will get worse
you have already started avoiding places and things you want to do.

If you want to talk further please dont hesitate to pm me

sending loads of positive thoughts your way xx

[sMINT]

Hey I dont know if this will help you but try searching online about "The Law of Attraction".

I read a good book (The Law Of Attraction by Michael.J.Losier) and help guide which teaches you how to attract positive thoughts and energy into your life and to keep out the bad/negative thinking which your mind does.

Hope you overcome this

[Krakers]

Hi Tanya, you're right - its easier said than done.

I have no miracle cure, I can only empathise as you are not alone. I've been in a similar situation several times. More often than not I avoided the situation, which isn't the best idea (but sometimes the douvet over my head approach is all I can muster).

I only know this. We all have good days and bad days. I spent a while beating myself up when I had a bad day, which led to another bad day. Just accept that once in a while it might happen, but tomorrow will be different.

I know this because at first it used to be bad months and good days. Then bad weeks and good days. Now its a bad day sometimes, and most times I'm fine.

It happens now and again, but if you allow yourself to feel out of sorts now and again without beating yourself up about it, then those days become just "blips".

I hope tomorrow you'll be a whole lot better.

Krakers.

[daniel_ploss]

i wish i could help you but i am going through something simalar

if you need someone to talk to PM me

[tanya 1]

hi,thanks for replying,well had a bad morning as you know so im going to let it go and start again tomorrow,my boyfriend works shifts 4 on then 4 off so hes off tomorrow, weds, thurs, and fri so im going to push myself going out on my own while he is on standby as my saftey net if i need him.
im really going to try and face my fear.
tanya 1 x

[bagpuss]

Its so difficult, i struggled with mine today but other days are fine. Sometimes its a case of having no option, my husband travels a lot with work so mine will miss out so much if i dont try and get them to places. Just do the trip as a last minute thing, leave as late as possible, arrive as the doors are open, take her in and leave asap. I remember you saying another mum now knows, maybe she will be there tomorrow as a bit of a safety net too. Keep talking to her or your daughter tro distract, i use my watch and think things will be over in 3 mins, then 2 etc and before long its done and over and you achieved what you set out to do. Gradually you will hopefully become more desensitised to it and be able to take her with more ease. Can you take her elsewhere, like the park, library etc? Or is it mainly nursery that is troublesome?

[tanya 1]

hi bagpuss,thanks for replying,i live in a village and dont drive so no i dont take her anywhere on my own,it all started when i moved out of my mums and rented a house until we found one to buy,but the house we rented was half an hours drive from friends or family,and when i had my daughter i had an infection and was really not well and also had postnatal deppression and was panicking all the time and with a new born baby i was getting no sleep not eating good,i was a mess honestly,so anyway this one day my boyfriend went to work and by mistake i had left the buggy and my mobile (didnt have house phone) in his car,well when i realised i just really panicked thinking oh my god im on my own what if something happens ?
so i ran upstairs (luckily i had written down everyones numbers in my diary )so i got the numbers got some change,put my baby in a sling on my stomach and walked about 20 mins to there nearest phone box,phoned my boyfriend(no answer ) so phoned his mum,burst out crying when she answered and told her i was having a panic attack come and get me.but let me tell you that 20 min walk to the phone box must of been the worst time of my life,i was so ill and panicking that i thought i was going to faint and squash my baby it was awfull.so thats when i stopped going out on my own with her.
tanya 1 x

[bagpuss]

Well, its very understandable that you have anxiety about going out alone. Must have been a horrific time for you, but remember that nothing bad did happen and you did manage. Its going to take a lot of work and perseverance but im sure you will get there. You can go out when others are with you, so have someone walking behind, rather than with you. That way there is some support but it is also giving you a bit of independance. Do you manage to get to places when you arnt with your daughter? Sometimes i find im ok on my own, but if i take my two along i can feel panicky and anxious. Not all the time, but it can be made worse by the extra responsibility. I can look after myself when like this, but a couple of children as well is almost too much.

Hope today was a better day for you
xxx