What is your ROOT PROBLEM?

[Piscian Daydreamer]

Okay, so we all suffer from anxiety and some of us depression. However, i honestly believe that deep inside each of us lies a root problem.... something which is the trigger for all of our anxiety.... something that perhaps has been with us for a very long time and we have been unable to change it.

I honestly believe, that if we solved this root problem, them we would no longer have anxiety, but i may be wrong, perhaps we are just anxious for no reason at all, genetics?

I was just wandering out of interest, what are your root problems? Dare to share?
I'll go first:

MY ROOT PROBLEM IS - insecurity from a lack of success with girls and still being a virgin.

yours???

[jackie]

my dads heart attack 12 years ago definitely triggered something. however i have talked about the root of it for years, and i dont see that this will end it for me. i feel i have to retrain my negative thoughts and learn to let go and really just live

anyone have the secret to doing just that, ill give them all the money i have in the world.lol

jackie

[april tones]

Hi!!
thats a brave thing to admit! nothing to be ashamed of tho as 19 is still young!
Are you shy with women/girls?
Im not sure about mine to be honest. I have always been a worrier, it got worse when i was very ill 5 yrs ago after taking illegael drugs and o.d.
Thats where it stems from with worrying about feeling out of control
My dad has same things as me like depression and i can see my self like him. But i get help,talk about it and look into it so i know whats wrong x

fibrochat) http://apriltones.proboards54.com

[JayK]

There is a theory/suggestion made by some of the experts that the real underlying 'root cause' of both anxiety/panic attacks and depesssion are the same:

A way to avoid dealing with and living in our own lives and struggles.

A 'Protection' if you will.

Of course, we all know these things dont exactly work very well but they do 'work'.
We avoid situations, we protect ourselves and we are constantly minimising our exposure to new things, places and people.

But yeah, I think you are onto something when you suggest its ultimately 'insecurity' and it really is something we are doing.
we are the 'root cause' if you want to get down to it.
Its not 'girls themselves'
Its not 'social gatherings' themselves.
It the insecurity you have inside you.

But yea.. If you are 19 then feel free to give yourself a break and relax about that.
Most of us men dont even start finding our 'secure place' in the scheme of these things until we are around 23.
Further more... there are plenty of men who stay virgins welllll into their 20s
You dont think that but its more true than we know.

[april tones]

I too believe in the protection thing!! x

fibrochat) http://apriltones.proboards54.com

[joolsukuk]

hi mine was after death of child, and then nearly losing another...shes fine and that was 16 years ago but fear of losing anyone not afraid of my own death just anyone i love ...i know the reason just cant get rid of anxiety,,,,

jools xx

[samjane]

Hi mine started after i was raped, this is why i hate the summer so much (thats when it happened) for some reason it make me feel so out of control. but i have come such a long way this year so now the summer is her it will be a bit of a tester.

Love and Light


Sam x

[giddy]

Not sure really - I've always been a worrier and lack confidence - I think it was stress of work and poor lifestyle that set me off!
Love Helen

[shiv]

Hi,

mine was a combination of events when I was between 19 and 21 years old. In order: the suicide of my step-father, the birth of my son and the suicide of my partner/son's father all within 23 months.

That was DEFINITELY the trigger.

Shiv x

[Wenjoy]

Hi
mine was 20 years ago when, after having a very unhappy childhood and feeling a failure - suddenly falling in love and being told I was a wonderful person - this kick started panic attacks - or this is what my therapist told me.

As for the recurrence of PAs which started a few months ago - cant think of anything except I am overweight and feel I havent fulfilled myself as the kids have grown up now and my other half thinks I should do more as I am more than capable!! This I think puts pressure on me to be slim and to ahieve more goals - I dont want goals but I do want to be slim!! Wenjoy