Not sure what made me look but I googled my brothers name tonight and came across the inquest report. Nothing contained was a surprise to me because I knew why he took his life but the thing that gets to me was the fact that no one let me know it was happening or had taken place.
If I had known it was happening, I'm not sure I'd have attended, given the graphic details and possibility of photographs etc, but it'd have been nice to know.
All feels a bit fresh again. I'm not looking for hugs or sympathy, just venting I guess