Dying of cancer.... :(

[penniepie]

I'm 7 weeks postpardum and all I can think is I won't be around for my son.
I'm so worried my body is riddled with cancer:

My 2 peeling dry moles- melanoma
My pain behind my right eye in the socket : brain cancer (it spread from my mole on my upper back)
My cuticle pain in my big toe: some sort of cancerous tumor (I gave no redness to indicate ingrown)
My constant aching back..,and upper body like flu..spreading cancer

I'm not going to be around for him :(
My mom lived until my 15th birthday and my life since she has been gone hadn't been the same. I dont want that for him :(

I'm in tears

[cattia]

I know how you feel, I have felt this way many times and when I think about not being around for my kids it is the most hearybrraking thing in the world. Bear in mind that you only have birth very recently. During pregnancy your health is monitored regularly through blood tests and scans etc, if there wad something wrong then most likely they would have picked it up. After having a baby your hormones will ne all over the place and a certain amount of anxiety and depression is common, even in those who have not suffered before so for those of us with anxiety everything is magnified. Having a child of your own has probably also bought back memories about your own mum. Why not talk to a Dr about how you feel? They may be able to suggest some help for you.

[PinkRoxy]

Honey (((hug)))

I am so sorry to hear that I wish there was something i could do to make it all go away and make you healthy again.

[katielou80]

pennie your fine, i developed severe health anxiety after my 2nd child. everyday im worrying! i have thousands of things at the moment like you, but deep deep down we know we are fine and these are just daily aches and pains that EVERYONE gets. i was given cbt (cognetive behaviour therapy!) which hasnt worked, ive been having constant skipped beats since oct 10 and im convinced im about to snufff it even though ive been to the drs 10 times!! also i had a sicknedd bug and fely ill and couldnt eat for a week, convinced i had cancer. ive thought ive had brain tumour, kidney cancer, glaucome, spine cancer etc.....i cant remember my last xmas that i wasnt pre-occupied that ive got an illness and i wont see next xmas. im 31 and have a great but stressfull life. my cbt lady said it was a common complaint after having a baby, because you hate the thought of leaving them, when i look back now ive WASTED 10 years worrying, my little girl is 10!!..........my miind is always pre-occupied! its so so sad. even at their nativitys my mind is in another place. i dont enjoy anything. i look at other people and wonder what it would be like not to be worrying about cancer etc 24/7. must be nice thets do this togther. thets enjoy life. your 100% ok, please believe me, ive been there....well still am a abit!! ha.................thets enjoy life. If we are still here at like 90 we will look back and realise how many years we have wasted worrying about all this crap!!...honestly. im now thinking i have stomach cancer and its the tumor thats pressing on my heart thats causing them!.....people laugh and say its just wind NOT CANCER!!... youve probably even had a chuckle....but in my head i believe this!!.....when i read what you symptoms are i thought...what!!!??lol but to you its all real. please listen to me. enjoy life. also if you think say we do get cancer at like 70 we will look back and think why did i worry when i was young about having this when i was healthy!! madness x x x x x

[sickandtired]

Penniepie
its possible you have post natal depression.Ive had it twice and was constantly worried about mine and my babies health,so much so i would sterilise my daughters bottles twice,or throw away milk because i was convinced it was contaminated.Drops in hormones really play havoc with our emotions as does any severe blood loss.I ve been anaemic for years and have suffered PND twice ,bouts of depression,now panic attacks.Perhaps its worth seeing your health visitor for a chat,dont be afraid to say how you are feeling......
I had really heavy periods and convinced myself i had ovarian cancer ,I envisioned my death,funeral,kids at the graveside.....it was real.. in my head..
.i was going to sleep crying neary every night
...im fine!!!....just a drop in progesterone....nothing sinister.when your worries get out of control,its time to seek help......good luck
message me if you need to chat

[kirstynic]

I feel for you I really do. I am missing out on being the mum my daughter deserves as I am so preoccupied with my health. I am now pretty sure I have bone cancer as have left knee pain and leg ache and tingling in my left leg. I am so scared and convinced I have this so my mind and thoughts are going to be devoted to this and IHate it :(

[katielou80]

after having therapy for all this, apart from being on meds 24/7 which are very bad for you!!! the only person that can help us is ourselfs. i think health anxiety is personally worse than depression. my children are 7 and 10 and its never left me! my dr is convienced that more people were diagnosed with health anxiety, which is actually classsed as 'mental health'... since the internet became more of a household necessaty, if you have mental health issues you will google symptoms and be CONVIENCED that you have it, where as years ago people couldnt, they wouldnt associate, a tingling in there ear, a sign of a stroke.....or pain in your eye...a tumor, we would just ignore it. when i had cbt for health anxiety i didnt realise that i was on the mental health list!! its scary stuff. we just need to change the way we think thats all. much love x x x x

[fluff]

Hi this is so common feeling and thinking like this after a baby but you will get better and stop haveing these thoughts i know how hard it is i had my boy 7 months ago.And ive had 3 eye tests 2 blood tests ecg and chest xray and i used to be up the docs each week but thankfully not now but have stress my body out so much i have loadsa tension.Have you got supportive partner? pm me if you want a chat xx

[Anxiousmess]

Hi there luv.. people keep telling me.. the things that mostly worry you will never happen to you..
You are so very lucky to have a child, and did u know that its harder to get pregnant if u are ill?? Like termally ill..
MY guess is yes u feel dreadful and of course u are worried u wont be around for ur baby, who wouldnt be??
All these thoughts u have are normal my dear, but u will be just fine!!!
I wish u great happiness and i hope u can over come these thoughts and feelings.. XxX

[charmcc123]

so relate to this honey im so scared of that horrid C and everywhere i turn i see it in papers news magz and people talking ive got to block it move over turn over. at the mo im thinking last xmas and i need to stop this, ive kept busy and it works leave google alone its horrid and you know what think back to any pains u had before u had ha and u would of brushed it off, and not run up docs, im doing this thing with myself at the mo and see if you can tell yourself this, live life to your max enjoy what you have now and never regret, cause we will waste our lifes worrying ourselfs sick for no reason and we miss out, honey these thoughts will be with us always but dont let those thoughts beat us, i know you have been through it so harsh, but live life to your full, and if your worried talk to your doctors how you feel and your mums history and see if they can help but please please dont let it ruin your life hun,