Hello everybody
I'm tired of feeling on the edge, sometimes i don't want to be in my own skin
I googled withdrawal symptoms to citalopram and came across this website, wonderful idea
i've had a troubled childhood, my mother was a bully and was violent on a few occasions. I ended up in a hostel, got into drug abuse and was raped. I have scars on my arm from the past
I am on the mend in the sensen of i don't smoke anymore, i don't do drugs and i have a job and my own bedsit and have friends but i take too much on emotionally.
I have concentration problems, struggle to understand things, clumsy, dippy, freaked out, on edge, traits of somebody with emotionally unstable disorder, overweight, get dizzy and panicky if i don't eat, fear of open spaces (like on a hill or in somewhere that's not surrounded by buildings) and i do get panic attacks when in open spaces I think i'm going to bge swept away off the earth and the sky is going to take me away it has been ever so frightening. I don't always think that I am having a heart attack, sometimes I think I am, having a reaction to something sometimes i'm paranoid I'll go mad, that I am slowly deteriorating, that I will die of something, I think about death too much, sometimes I think the earth is just going to drop and i freak out. I can't cope without carbohydrates it seems to make me feel better, I do a lot of sport and i struggle because when I do sports it makes me want to eat more and makes me dizzy and spaced out if i don't eat big hearty carbohydrate meals.
These are just a few things but i want to share it all, I also have problems with coming out with words, I stutter because I struggle to get the words out of my brain or I forget even some important parts so I'm sure it will creep in at some point. I do struggle with memory. I do have friends but I do struggle with close relationships. I can also be selfish w money and crave too much attention and talk about myself too much which I want to work on
However, despite these negatives, i have an eccentric personality and i make people laugh, it's my way of getting through it. I am never serious. \
\Thanks for reading
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