hi everyone. when my grandad passed away a few months ago i only had my mum but that meant everything to me because we have never really got on. i was so happy i thought this is it we are going to be like a normal mother and daughter.
but obviously it didnt last. she has rang me a few times just to tell me how useless and nasty i am. which i dont understand because i never yell or swear at her because i love her. she calls me all sorts and can never speak but has to yell.
she has told me theres no point to me going back to college as i will simply fail because thats what i am a failure. my councillor and boyfriend believe she may have bipolar because of how badly she treats me and for no apparant reason.
i do try and stay positive for my own sake but when your own mums yelling at you constantly it obviously drags me down and makes me feel quite suicidal. i have always craved her approval but i am started to realise i will never get it.
i asked her to tell me she loved me the other day and she couldnt i then asked her if she could think of one thing she liked about me and she hung up. even when i told her i am planning on going to africa to volunteer and build schools she wasnt interested. i just want family to love me