Guilt stemming from depression is a funny thing. I'll be in the depths of hell for weeks at a time but then suddenly it will all come up and I become so disgusted with myself for existing.
I want to tear myself to pieces, destroy myself there and then. The anxiety that accompanies these emotions is hidious and when it happens really does feel like I'm losing my mind.
To keep being gripped with an overwhelming need to murder oneself is an unsustainable place to be.
I'll try and look to the sun and seek that rainbow.
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