Hello everyone,

It's my first time on here, I'm a 28 year old construction worker and I've had anxiety and depression for 11 months now. I won't bore you with the details but my anxiety/depression is very up and down, two weeks feeling awful, one week feeling good, two weeks feeling awful etc etc.... I have had this intense fear in the past that my depression would drive me to suicide, but lately my thoughts and feelings are so dark. Life seems like a constant struggle, unbearable at times, meaningless, pointless, emotionless. I constantly questioning my excistince and what I mean to the world, universe etc..(I know..crazy right?) but these thoughts and feeling are leaving me hopelessly depressed. Every time I try to enjoy myself a barrier pops up in my and says "what's the point, what does it mean in the end?". Bloody depressing I know, I'm currently on citalopram 20mg but I'm going to my GP tommorow for either a change in medication or a dosage increase. I also attend therapy every Wednesday, I guess I'm just writing this on the hope that I'm not the only one to think like that and that eventually it will pass. Thanks for any replies guys.