More intrusive thoughts, less anxiety

[hempchick]

Hello everyone. Let me start off by saying I've had a few really good days lately, pretty much worry free. I'm unsure why, but at least I know it's possible to be happy again.
Today I was at my friend's house and I was holding her baby cousin when I got the intrusive image in my mind of me dropping her onto the floor and throwing her down on the couch. They really disturbed me so I layed her on a blanket on the floor and played with her without holding her.
The next episode came when my friend was telling me that her other cousin (7 years old) had been diagnosed with epilepsy but no one else in their family seems to have had it. I immediately thought of a brain tumor and started freaking out. I had thoughts such as "you want her to have a brain tumor" "you want there to be drama" when that's not true. I tried to not freak out but I feel really bad that I didn't freak out. I go back to the "what if they're not OCD thoughts" thing. I admitted having these problems to my friend and she says that she gets thoughts like that too. So that made me feel a bit better.
Anyone else deal with these sorts of thoughts? How to you make yourself believe they aren't real, or what helps you calm down?

[Tufty]

I think everyone has thoughts like these from time to time but when you've been unwell you are more alert to them and acknowledge these thoughts, that leads to analysing them and then questioning your sanity. You didn't freak out because you had the insight that you were not going to act on these thoughts, don't feel bad about this - see it as a sign of getting better.
I get these thoughts like these sometimes, I think its just part of the anxiety thing and 'thinking' too much, I try to keep busy, distract, talk with someone whilst alternatively making time to do relaxation and telling myself that they are just thoughts and feelings that I am in control and do not believe these thoughts, I have never acted on them before and never will.
Hope this helps
Sam

[Beckybooboo]

Hi,

I am so sorry to hear that you're going through this. I too am a sufferer of intrusive thoughts and I know how damaging they can be for the person/people involved.

I suffered from these thoughts (and still do to an extent) for around three months in my period of anxiety/depression/obsessive thoughts and let me tell you, they are NOT a true representation of who YOU really are.

Intrusive thoughts are unwanted thoughts that pretty much act out your worst nightmares, followed by that little niggly voice that encourages you to believe that you want that to happen. Let me tell you something, in all seriousness, as a person who has gone through this and come through the other side, these thoughts are NOT real and they will not do you any harm.

The best thing I found out of many coping mechanisms for these thoughts were quite simply just to let them come and go as they please, as difficult as it seems, it's better because you are no longer creating a stigma to these thoughts, thus causing them to slowly decrease and disappear into thin air. Remember, your thoughts are not things and when suffering from these thoughts I usually perform a "reassurance mantra" in my head, which isn't always the best thing as it can be a little addictive just reassuring myself that these thoughts are just because I'm unwell at the moment and not because I want them to happen.

Sooner or later, the thoughts will die out due to the lack of attention and stigma you attach to them. It's difficult, but with time, reassurance and determination you will be able to fight them off quicker than you can do the alphabet.

If you need to talk to me in private at all, message me and I'll be happy to help you.

All the best,
Becky

[hempchick]

Thank you both, your advice helped a lot.

[Beckybooboo]

No worries HempChick, if you need anything then give me a shout.