Ok I am in a really bad state, Sadly mine is caused by a major loophole problem that is almost impossible to control.
The main problem is my phobia of being sick, I am so terrified of being sick, and because I am so scared of being sick I worry, and the worry brings on a panic attack, the panic attack causes sickness and I end up in the loop of battling my body trying not to be sick, so because I am scared of being sick I worry about it, even when I dont worry about it the panic attack comes out of nowhere and triggers of the nausea.
Its getting worse each time, its now driving me to avoid nearly all situations, I cant even sit at home and relax, My life has gone down hill, I have tried everything from Motillium 10 for anti sickness to bachs natural remedies, indegestion tablets etc. But nothing works.
Because none of it works its now sent me even further into depression, I feel that no one can help me and that I am trapped in this stupid loop, I developed the attacks when I was about 7 years old, they were very minor back then, the attacks completely dissapeared for most of 2004 and 2005 with 1 attack recorded in those 2 years.
Over the past 8 months I have been very unstable, I dont have a family life, nor do I have anywhere to call home, I feel like im stranded on my own. A few weeks back I went out on the town for a night out and drank too much, the next day I was very ill, my stomache was wrenching and I was gagging it was horrible, since that day it has triggered of panic attacks that now repeat that simulation which is leading me to deep depression, I can no longer go out, face normal situations, I cant even be with my friends, I worry that i will have a panic attack in front of them, and the worry triggers it off, My doctor does not understand, the chemist have tried everything and no1 will listen to me, I get the usual lines such as "Your a hypercondriact" and "Stop being an idiot" etc which is very upsetting. These panic attacks leave me weak, fatigued and very low down and I dont think I can take much more,
If there is anything I can do id love to know, I am determined to take control of my body and mind, is it possible? what can i do? who can i see?
Would actually being sick (vomiting) help me overcome my fear?
I can safely say the being scared of being sick is whats triggering these attacks, But i really dont want to be sick,
I will do anything to make this a thing of the past so i can resume a normal life, even if i have to be sick to overcome it i will do it, i dont want to go ahead and do it if it makes no difference to these attacks,
Are there techniques to stop this developing?
If there was some way of being able to ecscape a panic attack, i would be able to prevent panic attacks, I would no longer worry about panic attacks if i knew there was a quick solution to stop it happening,
I have only a numbered amount of days now before I wont even be able to leave the house, everywhere i go triggers an attack, thus making the place ive been somewhere i can no longer go?
Im 19 and want to make a life for myself, with no one in person to help me I fear that I can't be helped,
Thank you for taking the time to read this
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