WHY OH WHY? GUTTED ITs BK

[Col]

Hi guys some serious advice needed! I have realized that once u get anxiety and have serious panic attacks that it's not easy to completely get rid of them or completely cure anxiety, anyway I was struck down last year 2011 and dare I say had a complete breakdown had to abandon teaching career ( old posts explain my background if u board or want a read) but I've recently since 2 was ago noticed those horrid feeling ( THE SERIOUS ONES) creeping back! Went out 2 Sunday's ago and felt adrenaline rush, got panicky driving and agitated! Last Sunday everything went dark felt faint panicked and had to get back in car, felt a bt better after 2 minutes and managed shopping! Then yesterday went into town with hubby and kids , very windy not eaten in morning and suddenly everything spinning started feeling breathless etc calmed down eventually but still not right! Has anyone ever had this , doing ok not 100% BUT ok then BAM weirdness again! Soo frustrated just started 1day helping children not in formal education with a local charity and just when everything seems ok. My dreams of ever doing a phd or finishing PGCE teacher training GONE! Money always a problem and more so when I feel like this. Telling people again - oh can't do a meal - panic attack, can't go out kids - panic attack! I'm soo shattered but have this defeated 'just take it' & quite calm fed up feeling! NEED A COFFEE again

[BobbyDog]

Just persevere and carry on with all your plans, accept it if it comes, but don't let it get the better of you. Perhaps it's just the run up to Christmas and all the rushing around, try and slow down when you are up and about as that will only fuel the anxiety. If it doesn't get any better go back to your GP.

[Annie0904]

Oh Col I am so sorry that these horrible feelings have come back. I am in the same situation, felt like I had overcome it then back to were I was at the beginning! I just keep telling myself though that I have beaten it before I can do it again!! Christmas is quite a stressful time and every where we go is busier than usual so I think a lot of people get more stressed this time of year. Think of this as a little blip and hopefully it will be over it soon. sending you xx

[potato11]

Col

I sympathise!!! I thought panic attacks would stop me from becoming a Midwife - but they haven't

I thoroughly recommend CBT, particularly an online course called CBT4panic (link in my signature) - it's written by a therapist called Robin who himself had panic attacks and agoraphobia for 5 years. He is excellent and extremely supportive, and can give you extra advice and guidance via email.

I also suggest the other link in my signature 'nothingworks' - it's also written by someone that overcame panic attacks, and is their understanding on how and why humans get panic attacks

hope that helps you will do it!

[Col]

Thankyou sooo much, Bobbydog and Annie. Just so weird. I thought I'd always have to some extent, since it started last year but thought I'd manage it, somehow? I anticipated that I'd have mild symptoms at certain times, but to go back about 10 steps, feeling like I did when I first started (Almost) ~ like the time when I just started getting used to what I was suffering with! To go back to this confirms that, it can come back and you have to just ride with it , to some degree ! It really is like an illness, it has it's own course. Im now starting to believe that you can't always control it, even if your used to it! Like yesterday, everything felt weird and out of place, even when I calmed down, just not right! Sensations of going mad, again as well. This is another learning curve for me because, it's come back and I've not, until now been through a reoccurrence of it!
Ohhh gosh it's awful! Feel really teary, not like me! Had to stop typing there for a moment! We bought some little Moroccan bowls yesterday me and my hubby, they are beautiful we said 12 years ago when we went to Tunisia that wed go back or go Morroco when we bought a house together! Weve had is sooo bloody hard (different cultures & families) & the sky is soo blue in Sheffield today, i looked at the bowls on my fireplace and it reminded me how happy I once was! Keep mulling over the times Thanks again

[Richard1960]

Its terrible i have suffered like you for years i would go back to your GP if you have not done so i am on Citalopram and everything is under control,but a good thing was it has slowed me down a bit given me breathing space to chill out and relax and think things through.

If you can do not alter your plans but do try to cut out caffeine based drinks,for years now i have had caffeine free coffee as the caffeine is a stimulant and could be contributing to your problems,if you are drinking plenty of coffee that is not caffeine free.

I wish you all the best you can do it.

Richard.

[Col]

Hi potato11, a big thanks, that's great help and advice, I'll have a look.

I've got a BSc, it's just that it isn't an accredited science degree that allows me to register as a scientist, that would be a few extra module and more money! That's why when I had my 2nd child I thought I'd go for the 1 year PGCE science teaching? But that's when panic struck. Oh well, I'm sure I'll get back but being a mum of 2 it does make things difficult, on top of the anxiety!

Thanks so much for the advice x

---------- Post added at 11:43 ---------- Previous post was at 11:40 ----------

I know Richard, caffeine is not good at times like this especially. Can't help it, if I'm stressed I drink loads. I'll get some decaf later .

Collette x

---------- Post added at 11:44 ---------- Previous post was at 11:43 ----------

I'm going to log oFf I'm too tears can't see the screen and my little boy isn't at nursery today, I keep having to run upstairs. XXX thanks for the support ad advice.

[Annie0904]

Col, Just want to send more hugs This anxiety is so horrible and I hate to see so many good people suffering. xx

[Col]

Thanks soo much Annie, your such a great member on NMP. I wish u didn't suffer But, I'm glad there are people like u who really understands. I felt soo upset earlier, so scared of getting bad again.

[Annie0904]

Thanks soo much Annie, your such a great member on NMP. I wish u didn't suffer But, I'm glad there are people like u who really understands. I felt soo upset earlier, so scared of getting bad again.

That is just how I felt the beginning of last week. I called my doctors and said I thought I was totally losing it and was going mad. They sent the doctor to me and he said I am very ill, not mad! I have picked up since last week but it takes a while to get back on your feet as it is just so exhausting. I cried nonstop for 3 days last week. Only had a few little moments of sobbing today so I count that as progress.