not sure if i can cope on my own anymore

[W.I.F.T.S.]

Hi trevor,

I know that you've been very positive in the past and this does seem like a bit of a blip.

When I first became ill i was still able to go to places, but I've gradually felt more and more confined to my home town. I think that a lot of that has to do with new fears that have occured to me and also because i don't feel as comfortable as I used to in my own body.

My routine used to be to drop my girlfriend off at work and then come staright back home and spend the morning on the computer. I realised how unhealthy that was and how it actually exacerbated my anxiety and depression, and so I've been spending time at the gym instead.

What is it that you actually fear will happen if you go more than a mile away from home?

I would definitely say that you need more human contact and I'd be very, very surprised if there weren't some self-help groups in your area and CBT is also a very good idea too.

I 've been volunteering for about 6 months and it's really expanded my social circle. I'm still not quite at the point where I could call them mates, but I know many more people than i used to.

I'd love to have a life coach. I don't know whether you've seen programmes such as fear of flying or paul mckenna's I can make you thin, but I think that I'd really benefit from having somebody to give me encoragement and advice.

I'm sure that you are the same as me and that your anxiety levels are high, which causes you to try and avoid any possible danger, which leads to depression because you feel so limited. In my opinion, the way to beat it is to work on physically relaxing (exercise, yoga, healthy eating, proper sleep, meditation...) and also to try and work on positive thinking and having a mentality where you want to face your fears and do things. There are fewer better feelings than the euphoria of conquering a fear.

Ships in harbour are safe..but that's not what ships were built for.

[Paddington]

hi Trevor.I was gunna suggest NO PANIC too but it has been done!Give them a ring!I was the same as you ,truly iwas!I read Nicola's cbt diary on her[for her driving but it covers everything!]and thatmade such a difference to me,i donr know how really it just sunk in, that i can do stuff,if i feel awful,thats ok too just go home!It is a kind of get out clause!So what happened is this ,...i did more stuff,on saturday i went to TOWN ,in a CAR to the SHOPS and in a CARPARK ..ahg!Hey iam still here!The more little things i do anfget thru it the more i attempt.So get on the list for cbt hun ,read thre cbt post and keep posting !Good lluck,love mary rose.xxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

we are all in the same boat and can guide each other ashore

[W.I.F.T.S.]

You see families where the parents are really supportive and encouraging, where the child and parent are more like best friends and where they share everything and do so much together. And then, you have families like mine where they can be sarcastic, controlling and critical and where there doesn't seem to be much closeness.

Whenever I feel anxious or depressed and i text my mrs, I don't think she really knows how to cope and i don't get the support back that I need.

I don't feel like I have any friends either that would sit and listen to me or who I could turn to for a hug.

It is really hard when you don't have a support network. I'm closer than my brother than I used to be, but he's not someone that I could sit down and talk to.

I have thought that it might be useful for me to have a counsellor or a life coach.

I know that we all have these images that we see on tv in our heads of being part of a really close group of friends and having a great time. Are they a reality or something unobtainable? Is it me? Do I repel people?

i don't really like going away with my mrs because she suffers from anxiety and panic attacks too and she's not really a very calming influence. Whenever we go anywhere I feel much safer having other people around- hence, why I feel quite agorophobic myself.

i don't know whether it's the same with you, but even seeing far away places on the tv makes me feel sick in my stomach. But, on the otherhand, I'd love to see the world, which makes me feel really depressed.

Ships in harbour are safe..but that's not what ships were built for.