I'm posting this in the hope that someone else might get the mini 'eureka' moment that I had this morning when I had these thoughts
It's all a matter of perspective - this anxiety business - I think. If your perspective is short, and limited to the boundaries of your fears, then you'll forever be limited. But if you alter your perspective, to look beyond your fears, a wider world opens up to you.
This morning I had a follow-up appointment with my Herbalist. I was mulling over what updates I had for him, and bemoaning the fact that I had found my anxiety more troublesome last week - I was anxious more or less every day, and found things hard-going. Then I took a mental step back and realised: my fears, and the uncomfortable week they had given me were crowding my thoughts, hemming me in to see only them. I'd forgotten that I'd driven my car 60 miles, stayed out alone over 2 hours, been to a meeting about starting some ad hoc work, coped with the death of a pet and having a stranger in my home. And more importantly, I'd forgotten that I'd still done all these things in spite of, and whilst, feeling anxious!!
That shift in perspective, to look beyond the boundary of my anxiety to what else had happened last week, was a really important moment for me this morning. Instead of being unhappy and stressed about a perceived lack of progress (a step backwards, even) at my appointment, I actually went in with a certain amount of positivity, my pulse rate was the lowest it has ever been since I've been having appointments there (a normal 80bpm), and my herbalist feels that I've made such good progress (in my outlook, as well as physically) that he would like to use me as a positive case studyYes, I had felt increased anxiety, but I had tackled it, and still managed to do what I wanted in spite of it, which is the key to continued recovery.
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Magic
