Ugh, still horrible anxiety.
I still feel pretty rubbish about being single but the bloomin' anxiety over being lonely (which I'm not) has crept back up again. I find it so difficult to control the thoughts of being lonely, it's a really horrible, stomach churning feeling when those thoughts come. My mind is constantly trying to 'prove' them to me too. Boredom is my main problem, I think. Boredom is causing my anxiety to get worse, to over-analyze myself and everyone and everything around me.
I'm feeling sensitive about silly little things which isn't helping. I'm getting jealous over my close work-friend getting closer to the new girl who I'm good friends with too, they've spent a bit of time together outside of work this past week and I'm feeling left out. Also, today at work, my close work friend was having conversations directly with her about things, and again I felt left out. It's just stuff they've already talked about at work before when I wasn't in or around which she'd only really know about but I still felt left out. But I know it's silly and just my anxiety over-exaggerating it due to the anxiety about loneliness. They've involved me completely in all our plans together and one's they've cooked up together with me involved, they couldn't wait to tell me about them! So I know it's very silly but and I'm annoyed with myself for feeling like this. Me and my close work friend went out on Sat night together after my birthday meal and it was nice just me and her spending time together like old times. They both have serious boyfriends so that's something they have in common and obviously talk and gossip about too.
I seem to be going through this needy, appreciation phase at the moment, it's like I need reassurance that people care about me. (Probably anxiety induced!)