Feeling Scared & Free Floating Anxiety

[Warriornotworrier]

Hi all,

I'm not having a good day. I've self diagnosed myself with OCD and have been suffering with intrusive thoughts for almost a year now, pOCD if you know it. Also a few years ago I used to suffer from intrusive thoughts about death and I feel like it's rearing its ugly head again. I keep worrying about my parents getting older, dying. I feel scared of everything and it keeps making me burst into tears. Could it be the recent intrusive thoughts are just heightened anxiety and that's why I'm behaving this way? I just want to be strong again but I feel so weak. Any help much appreciated.

[mnaha]

I worry about dying all the time..not sure just why..I have had a long life and a better one than I could ever thought..I guess im a control freak..I don't want to die.. but we all will one day but the comforting thing about that is that everybody and everything you know will pass away..time, the earth ,the galaxy ,the universe and one day there will be nothingness again and no one or nothing will ever know we existed or that this planet did or maybe even this universe...you say oh my God I don't want to die right now.. I hear you.. but then again if you die now or later you still die.. and all the people you leave will be right behind you and then the planet and the galaxy and universe and so on...and on a very quick time scale although it seems long to our puny human lives.. it is a mere blink of an eye.. Universes and galaxies and mountains and oceans have come and gone so quickly over a timeless space..it is said that when you die we don't wait for others because that they are already there.. Einstein believed that time was a man made idea. That all time exist in the present.. That man is the only creature that invented the past or the future..as the future will become the present and the past was and is all at the same time so ..its all relevant..and nothing is.. so hope you worry less..if you think about things our existence and our presence here is nothing in the grand scheme of things..even our universe is basically meaningless.. as time goes.. it will too pass away and all things that it encompasses

---------- Post added at 02:17 ---------- Previous post was at 02:09 ----------

Oh and by the way I can offer one piece of advice and cannot tell you enough.. ENJOY YOUR YOUTH.......ENJOY YOUR YOUTH.. ..because you get old real quick and old sux..it really does.. one thing I didn't prepare for was old.. because frankly I never thought i would live this long and its everything I wasn't wanting to experience...so please please please try to quit worrying and thinking about the future but savor every moment of the youth and vitality because one day those people that you look at and go ooooohhhhh look at those old gross old people because one day you will be those old gross old people.. its a horse of a different color when you are the one that is being looked at as old and gross.. so enjoy enjoy enjoy and savor every precious youthful moment and don't waste a nano second of it.. because time..man made or not passes very very very quickly and we will all be dust in 100 years and no one will know we ever existed or no one will be around to remember when we were here.. anyway have a nice day