loneliness and anxiety

[oshun]

hello there

this is quite a difficult one for me to right but i'm not feeling so good this morning and i just want to get off my chest about loneliness.

well here goes: is it embarrasing to admit to loads of people i dont really know but i get really really lonely, and i know this makes my general anxiety and panic a lot worse. its sort of like i spend most of the week days alone feeling extremely anxious for one reason or another, things i find it hard to cope with like sorting out my financial situation and dreading the postman coming, and then the weekend comes and i feel i can breath a sigh of relief and be myself for a day or so. but most weekends i just spend alone and this makes me feel very down. i do have freinds/family but they have partners/kids/houses...etc etc, and i just dont fit into their lives somehow.

well alone at weekends i buy a travel card and make myself go places cos im not going to mope at home. but as the years go by, the harder i find this to do. i sort of said to myself yesterday that i'm not going to be alone all weekend anymore..but realistically i dont really know what to do about it. i do phone freinds and try to make plans and i have joined clubs/evening classes etc .... i dont really know anymore. right now, today, this morning, i just feel like dealing with the loneliness and the anxiety is eating a huge hole into my soul, and i just feel like curling up and shutting it all out.

to make it worse, my best freind said to me on the phone " there is no light at the end of my tunnel". she is wrong of course, but do these people realise that i am human just like them?????

help. i don't know who else to talk to, talking to the samaritans doesnt seem to get me anywhere

oshun

[Meg]

Hi Oshun,

I think there are many who are in very similar situations to you .

When you're alone with your thoughts they do tend to spiral out of control more as you don't get a break from them and it can get very lonely indeed withn just your own company

Well done for joining classes etc. That breaks the evening up a bit . What are you learning ?

Many people have found a help in doing some voluntary work which is doing something worthwhile and being needed without having much responsibility.

The chat room is open 24/7 and although it is usually at its busiest in the evening you can arrange with other people at home in the day to pop in for a chat during the day .





Meg

Anxiety is a thin stream of fear trickling through the mind.
If encouraged, it cuts a channel into which all other thoughts are drained.
Robert Albert Bloch

[Karen]

Hi Oshun

Like Meg said I think a lot of people can identify with this. I spend most of my time alone and I know I find it difficult to control my thoughts when I'm alone, particularly at night.

It sounds like you are really trying to do something about your loneliness and that is to be congratulated.

I have recently started using the chat room in the evenings, although I mostly just watch the conversations. I have social phobia and even talking in the chat room is too much for me at the moment. But it can be a distraction from my own thoughts for a while.

Briary

[seh1980]

hello there Oshun,

It sounds like you are doing all the right things in ordeer to try to get out and keep yourself busy. We all feel lonely sometimes so you're not alone there!! Try to keep it up! Take care.

Sarah

[Merlinssister]

We all get lonely, even if we're surrounded by people. I'm really impressed with all that you're doing. Online stuff is good. Are you involved in anything else online? I'm into scifi and there are some good communites out there for that.

[stimpy]

I think everyone can identify with this one. [^]

Long Story cut very short .... [8)]

Met penpal, liked him, loved him, moved from Durham to Birmingham.

And so there began a another spell of loneliness.
After leaving my family and friends behind, I had to start again.

10 years later, 1 new best friend and a whole street of neighbours I am fairly close to.

I think you can be in a crowd of people and still be very lonely.

Loneliness is an in build thing. Because we all suffer with various conditions that are anxiety related we tend it feel it more.
Mainly I think because it cuts us off from others who sometimes have no idea how we feel.

Well done Oshun for getting a travel card and having the courage to go out. I think it's brilliant!

Love, light and Best wishes
Liz xxx
With hard work and determination and all the things you know.
The world is there for you to take. There's nowhere you can't go.


[]Scatty Eccentric & 'Poet Laureate to panic and anxiety'

[oshun]

hi meg

thanks for your reply, i have taken a part time evining course of egyptology. i did the 1st part last year and have 2/3 more years to go. i start again later this month. yes i have looked at voluntary work and did a bit before but i was alone in an office and didnt feel so good so stopped that one, but last week i have applied for another voluntary job and am waiting to hear.

i suppsoe i sort of get very angry about things cos i feel there is a lot of life in me and before i alwasy liked soicalising and now i feel the real me is being squashed..if that makes any sense

thanks for your support

oshun



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[oshun]

hello briary,

thanks for your reply. i read your posts before about social fobia and i really felt for you {{}}. i am ok in chat rooms but i do have problems with phone and email.

i hope when you are feeling more up to it to meet you in the chat room here. in the meantime take good care, x and thanks for the support

oshun

[oshun]

hello sarah,

thanks for your message, it's good to know i am not alone,
you take care too

oshun

[oshun]

hello merlinssister,

thanks for your message.
actually i'm not really involved in anything esle online although i am ( used to be) a designer so have a website which i work on. and YES i am a sci fi fan. i love it! before i looked for good sci fi communties online but didnt find one i liked....i also like trying to illusrate sci fi books ( for my own fun)

do you like: starwars/dune/bladerunner/gene wolfe ??

good to meet you

oshun

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