Its funny for many weeks I have been trying to fight the feelings of anxiety and get on with my life.I alway wonder why my wife doesnt make passes at me and this has been a sore spot with me long before I got anxiety .I have talked to her straight ,tried to reason with her,told her it made me feel bad about myself and why she just refused to make me feel like im desirable..Actually to tell you the truth this may have started my depression anxiety .. or at least contributed to it..We moved way out in the middle of nowhere with no one and she acted like this with me.Ok I started feeling better and working at being ok ..Lately I have been trying to be more like my old self and been flirting with her a little here and there and ask her why she didnt do that with me..same old story..it doesnt enter her mind.. Ok..then I ask her why and she said oh I thought about it but you have had anxiety and depression so thats why I havent .I said thats a lie i have been asking you this for a year or more prior to my anxiety and it might have contributed to my depression ,she flew into a rage and said it was my fault because I was depressed and anxious.Its a lie because we have been at this for over a year talking about it..Im just feeling down here because im trying and want to get better and this would help but she doesnt care enough to make me feel better about myself ..I dont know what to do ..its making me slip back into anxiety and depression more..and well its just not fair..
PRAYER FOR FREEDOM FROM SUFFERING
May all beings everywhere plagued
with sufferings of body and mind
quickly be freed from their illnesses.
May those frightened cease to be afraid,
and may those bound be free.
May the powerless find power,
and may people think of befriending each other.
May those who find themselves in trackless, fearful wilderness--
the children, the aged, the unprotected--
be guarded by beneficent celestials,
and may they swiftly attain Buddhahood.