As a sufferer for years of health anxiety and panic, i also have just had to change my meds 2 weeks ago cos of a reaction. However, last week i got a call from my sister telling me that my mum was feeling bad and had collasped, we both raced to her house as she lives alone since dad died suddenly last year in a& e (such a shock), we called a ambulance , they thought that she had a heart attack but after 4 days in hospital and a ct scan she has had a mild stroke.
I havent eaten barely anything for over a week now as i have no appitite, cant sleep as just as im drifting off i get terrifying thoughts that jolt me awake. Doc has given me sleeping tablets they help a little. I just feel totally unable to cope with it all. My sister is caring for mum at her flat at the moment, but it upsets me just to see my usually fit mum (my inspiration and whom i adore) feeling weak and so tired.
My nerves are out of control, my thoughts are only morbid scarey ones i live in terror of my phone ringing incase she has another stroke.
My sister is coping wonderfully and doesnt seem to have the same fears as me!!! but i feel a complete failure at a time when i need to be strong and supportive im useless and weak.
I just want to be alone constantly and even my kids are being ignored as im too stressed to cope.
A huge boil has appeared on my chin, the doc said its due to stress and has given me tablets.
I wake each morning full of fear and dread for what may come with the day, and just want to stay in bed and sleep constantly.
Thank you for reading this, i dont suppose anyone can help me but thanks for listening xxx
tracie xx