Hi, just looking for some advice/support.
I work in a job that is very social so people drink/go out and I find myself joining people for fear of missing out or being perceived as boring I guess. I do like wine but unless I was going on a night out I wouldn't normally drink spirits etc at home. I find that when I drink I will always go too far and drink too much. I can't seem to just go out and have one or two drinks then go home, as after the first two I start to get tipsy and feel relaxed so I end up having more.
The next day is always the same. I feel awful. I get really paranoid about things I've said or done especially if I can't remember certain parts of the evening. Sometimes I make up scenarios in my head to fill in the gaps from the night before. I start reading newspapers/watching the news to see if there was any crime committed in the area I was out in that night! I know in reality that I'm a nice person who wouldn't dream of hurting anyone else but for some reason when i'm hungover I imagine all sorts and start to think 'but what if'. I never used to feel like this when I was 18/19. I would feel a bit embarrassed maybe about things I'd done but not to the extent I feel now.
I know it's all self inflicted and no one forces me to drink (I'm not an alcoholic, I rarely drink indoors just on nights out) but I feel it would be hard to not drink when everyone else is although it would save me a lot of anxiety and paranoia in the days after.
Can anyone else relate? I know the simple answer is to just never drink in order to stop making stupid mistakes. I think because I'm still in my 20s and most social situations involve alcohol that I can't imagine just sitting there with a sparkling water!
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