Thanks - and you are not putting words in my mouth! That is a big part of the problem. I am on the waiting list with the NHS for CBT, but as I can only do it in the evenings after work I have been waiting for 2 months so far to get seen! Apparently I am now at the top of the list, so hopefully I will get seen soon. I have been using the headspace app to do meditation every morning, which I do think is helping, and have been reading Dr Claire Weekes and trying to put into practice some of her advice. I am also exercising regularly.

All of which is helping, but the bad days are still bad. It is funny, reading my post from Monday today, when I am in a better space, and I almost don't recognise the person who wrote it. It is amazing how different our entire being can be when we are in the depths of anxiety/depression. I guess I just have to keep working at it and trust the good days will get more frequent....

And Epitaxial - I think the brain is a pretty resilient thing, and will adjust to whatever we throw at it, it just takes time. I am not someone who thinks people should be off meds if they work for them - in fact, in hindsight, I should never have come off the Prozac last summer. But unfortunately it seems that my body has decided that SSRIs are the devil, so I don't really have much choice. And now, after such a horrible 6 months of side effects (which were waaaaaaaay worse than my experience off drugs) I am far too scared to try anything else. So now it is just me and my brain trying to get along again....