Hi there,
I too had severe thoughts of self harm and harming of others, as a mother this scared the hell out of me , and that is what made it so much worse, the fear kept it going ....
I walked away from using knives , driving a car, going out , even boiling a kettle was impossible, i became frozen by fear....
It is very very hard to trust others when they say you wont act on these thoughts, but as someone who has been through it - YOU WILL NEVER EVER DO IT , I also work for No Panic and in all the years they have been running NO ONE has ever acted on these thoughts...
Recovery is totally possible as I did it, its hard but we have to accept the thoughts , laugh at them - say to yourself " oh here we go again come on then do your worst I am ready for ya "
Let them run their course - ignore them challenge them anything you can BUT dont RUN from them...
My thoughts six months ago we there constantly every minute of the day - now i may get the odd one every few days usually if i am tired , i ignore them as i now know I am not that person who would act on them.
If you ever need to talk pm me or talk to me in chat
Good luck