can people make you suffer more?

[Lucylee]

hey, im new to this and i have been suffering with depression for about 6 years maybe more. Everytime i feel like my life is getting better it all comes crashing down. does anyone feel like somebody else courses their depression or makes it worse?

ive been with this guy since i was 15 im 24 now. his had two full affairs on me and still feels the need to message girls. we both suffer with depression and anxiety. I found at christmas about the second one and then he said it was finished but still carried on till march. i kicked him out and he seemed to have changed and so i had him back as we have a 3 year old aswell and he thinks the world of his dad. i thought we were getting better going to counselling for couples with depression and then I find out yesterday this site was on his history and he was having another chat with a girl not in the ways you would think. i understand these sites help people and ive told him that its totally fine as long as the conversation wasn't inappropriate, well it was and his had this for 2 years. its like he has an addiction to speaking to other girls and then it escalates.

anyway thats abit of the history i just want to know how i can stop him from affecting my mental health. i binge eat also and have done since his first affair. i have no confidence whats so ever because of him. could he be making my depression worse? or could my depression be there because of him? i just dont even know where this post was going. i just needed someone to speak to. ive packed his stuff and i dont want to have contact with him but due to our child i dont want him to be damaged through all of this. im just to nice, anyone had an experience like this?

[Roseessa]

Yes, of course, he is making your depression worse.
You probably feel like crap because of what he did, when someone cheats it can bring on really bad insecurity on the person they are with. This can lead to low mood, which can lead to binge eating/drinking and that just makes it worse.
You should have kicked him to the curb the first time he did it. Are you still together?
I understand you have a kid together but he is not helping you at all and it could turn ugly which your kid would not want to see.
How are you feeling today?

[MyNameIsTerry]

Admin have issued advice to members not to use this place inappropriately:

http://www.nomorepanic.co.uk/showthread.php?t=129143

Perhaps it's worth reporting to them?

It must be hard for you because you want what's best for your child before yourself but if this guy can't stop himself he needs to know their are consequences to his actions as you shouldn't be used and he can't use his child to keep you together (if that's something he does).

Can't he see how he's risking upsetting his child even if he can't see that he is upsetting you? Both are wrong.

[Lucylee]

Sorry it's a late reply! Thank you For all the advice! The few days I have hit rock bottom, my moods are low and I'm feeling so tired.. however I have a little one so he pulls me out a lot of the time. Update on the situation we have had a chat and things we're going a lot better until I found out the person he was talking to is also the person he had an affair with. It wasn't anything like before he didn't meet her again, he didn't say the same things as he did before like I love you and all of that. But I'm feeling even more betrayed and I know it's not my fault because I know I'm a caring person and I'm at that stage in my life now where I want to make me happy, it's just everytime I do he drags me back down. I'm to blame though because I allow him to do it to me. I feel like there's not any more room to try this and that I've tried everything I possibly can, none of it works and he doesn't even care about my depression or what his doing to me. I've told him that his a bad parent for doing this to me because he hasn't just done it to me but his done it to his child and our family. He seems to think because his only 3 he won't know. But I need to stop this because I'm not going to allow my child to be brought up in a family that he has tarnished all our hard work together...

Sorry I'm just blabbering on.

To the person who mentioned slimming work I tried that to I lost 2 stone but I ate clean mon-fri and then on the weekend binged. I'm trying to not go crazy and all out on foods but it's just hard

[Roseessa]

Hi,
I'm sorry to hear about your mood.
Are you still together or are you on a break or something?
Your kid is an important thing but you are as well.
You have to do right by you and your kids.
Babble away