Rational Research (?)

[pgw84]

I have been trying to do some 'rational research'. I tried this a while back and again earlier, with the assumption that I could learn about the very thing my anxiety is about, how it happens, why etc..

My main fear is having an undiagnosed heart condition, as I mention in nearly everyone of my posts. In fact, I think I do have an undiagnosed heart condition, it's more than a fear, and I'm just waiting for the moment to die, even though I want to live a great life.

I was looking around the CRY (Cardiac Risk in the Young), but I can't seem to get anywhere and it only leaves me feeling worse, but I want to know about this stuff. I read there and several other places before that an ECG doesn't always pick up a problem and some of them can't be detected with an ECG. Some even had an ECG only to die later.

The main message I got from looking at the website was, if you're having what you think are any heart related problems, go get yourself checked out ASAP. Once you had the tests done, then it gives you piece of mind, I even watched David Walliams having an ECG and an Echo, recommending other young people to do the same. I thought to myself - I want an ECG and Echo - but it's not going to happen, I won't get refered, I had an ECG before, which was scuttled away, then the doctor looked it up on a computer and told me it was fine didn't really help. Now the doctors tell me I'm fine and it's all anxiety regardless.

I'm just not sure what to do and feel completely stuck. I want to get all this sorted out and I can't, even though I want to. I don't know what the purpose of this post is, it's nothing I haven't said before and no doubt I'll feel silly for posting such nonsense.

[nomorepanic]

Ok try to think rationally.

What makes you think you have a heart problem? What pains/aches and symptoms etc?

Do you smoke, drink are overweight and any history of heart problems in the family?

You could always go privately to get the tests done but it would cost a bit I can imagine.

[pgw84]

Hi Nicola!

It started with chest pain, which I've had for year's and a fast pulse. I still get the strange chest pain, but it's often shooting and repetitive and in different places. I have to admit my pulse has slowed down a lot lately as I've been doing more exercise, so I think my resting pulse was a bit fast because I was unfit. Other times though I get a weak fast pulse and feel like I'm going to pass out. I get ectopic beats, but these only appeared earlier this year, normally when out and about and feeling socially anxious. The other funny beats I get feel different to the ectopics, I don't feel an extra beat and don't get the dropping sensation. Exercise and exertion sometimes bring them on, it's where my heart is beating quick from the exercise, then when I breathe out it drops down to resting type pulse but beating very hard and I can feel it beating inside my chest and pulsing round my body, when I breathe in it speeds up again. The worse bit is after breathing in and starting to breathe out, there is a big pause, then a big thud as it carries on beating slow and hard, although it should still be beating quick.

I don't know what causes that last symptom, but I'm starting to accept the others as anxiety, even if most the time I don't think I feel anxious at the time. I find it kind of reassuring I have so many symptoms (I also feel sick most of the time and have losts of tingling in forehead and feet, often lasting days at a time). But the fact I feel so ill all the time and always getting strange unexplained things coming out of the blue, I can't help but think there is something wrong.

I also think back to when I was younger and how there were several occassions when I was close to fainting. I've woken up a couple times in the past too to find my heart beating very very slowly and so powerful it moves my whole body, feeling like I'm choking.

I also have to admit that maybe even if I didn't have these symptoms I would still probably worry a bit about this.

I don't smoke, I rarely drink alcohol and I'm not overweight (underweight if anything ). There's no family history of young heart trouble either.

Even if I wanted to go private, I couldn't, I'm poor.

Reading this post back it easily looks like anxiety for most of it, but it feels too simpler an explanation. I guess the only thing I base my diagnosis on is the fact I feel so ill and my mind won't shut up. I don't want there to be a genuine problem, only to ignore the warning signs because of anxiety, then it's too late.

[bluebirds2005]

well i have the same fears as u and in the 5 years ive had health anxiety ive probably had 20 ecg,s all normal but i still had to ask the specialist if an ecg could miss something and his reply was the only time an ecg can miss something is in very significant heart disease which u obviously havent got if u can still exercise

[darkangel]

Hi Just wanted to give you some reassurance too. Ive been having the same Health anxiety thoughts for over 10 years now and had every test I can think of and been checked out and rechecked. Everything was normal and yet I still felt so ill. Realising that it was my thoughts that were making me ill took a very long time to accept but nothing bad has ever happened and Im still here. I still get sypmtoms on a daily basis but they dont have the same hold over me and they are slowly subsiding.

Have you ever had CBT (cognitive behavioural therapy)? It challenges the way we negatively think and makes us rationalise.

Luv Darkangel x

[nomorepanic]

Ok that all sound normal for anxiety I am afraid.

You have to accept the heart is a muscle and needs exercise too as it can be tense. Stretches will help this.

Have a read of the symptoms page for more reassurance.

[pgw84]

Thanks for the reassurance. I think my biggest problem now is accepting anxiety as a diagnosis, as my mind is fixed on something being wrong as it certainly feels that way, it's hard to genuinely accept it's anxiety. I'm sure I've read a number of things about this in the past, but nothing sticks in my brain. Does any have any info?

I've not tried CBT darkangel, I've been on a couple workshops and spoke to a mental health worker. I'd try CBT given the chance I think.

The symptoms page (and others pages) are of great help. Most I get, some I don't, others aren't mentioned. Another difficulty is knowing what's anxiety and what is genuine. Does anyone have any advice for this one too?