Panic attack while travelling / hiking

[nicolas.mt]

Hello all!
Just discovering this website. I’m having huge anxiety issues related to a travel I’m currently in. So I’ve been planning for a long time of trip in New Zealand for 2 months followed by a week in French Polynesia.
I love to go hiking so I’ve made a list of all those hikes I wanna do while travelling into those countries.
A couple of months before coming to NZ I’ve had vertigo. This put me in an anxiety kind of state which has not really let me go since. I’m anxious about all those hikes I wanna do but unsure I’ll be able to, the mountain huts I’m sleeping in (but in which I never sleep very well), my shoulder (I just dislocated it today, but for me it happens from time (I’m very laxed of the shoulder). Etc etc. I am a fairly experienced hiker and fit and usually not stressed about those things. I think I just made myself a lot of expectations and now don’t know what do to with it. Just another example, I just completed a multi hikes and pretty much everything went well, except the sleeping in the huts that are never that great. The only solution I see is to let go those hikes but I’ve paid a lot for this trip and spent a lot of time planning it so I’m feeling a bit stupid and frustrated to cancel it even though I’m kind of fine after all. I’m from Montreal so New Zealand is very far for me and I won’t be coming back soon.
Does someone had similar experiences and could help me with that? Or just share? Or perhaps some solutions?
Thanks!

[Catkins]

What is it that you're most anxious about? Is it mainly to do with the sleeping arrangements?

To me it sounds like you have done really well so far. You have continued the hikes, even with anxiety lurking. Could you just take it on a hike by hike basis? Do the next one, see how it goes and then consider what to afterwards with the next one. Is there anything you can do to improve the sleeping situation? Do you have ear plugs? An eye mask?