So fed up of feeling anxious!

[maxine]

Hi,

This is more of a rant than anything else and i'm hoping i'm not the only one feeling so flamin fed up with the whole anxiousness thing.

After 2 blissful years of being panic free i'm all panic attacks and anxiety again, I used to be agoraphobic and although it's not as bad as that anymore i'm just so damm fed up of having to deal with this crap again.
I can't even go out for dinner anymore with out it being an ordeal, why did they have to come back, what happened to make them come back, when will they go away again all the thoughts running through my head, all the time!

I want my life back, I want to be able to go shopping in town for clothes and shoes for hours again, I want to go out for dinner without it being a huge issue! argh.

I hate this.

Thanks for reading my rant.

Maxine

[belle]

Hi..

Like you i was panic free for a good few years, despite my life still being somewhat dominated by agoraphobia, i certainly lived a life a lot better than what i am now. I relapsed in Nov 2006 and am finding it ever increasingly hard to overcome...

I've been angry with myself so many times, but what is the point?

[joy]

dont we all more or less on this site feel the same.
Can you think of anything thats brought it back???
Were you on meds before when you were bad?

I hate it so much its ruining my life along with many others I suspect.

Havent got an answer but wish I did

Love Joy

[Lilith1980]

Hi Maxine

I think the fact you are so angry and fed up about this shows you arent going to let it "win" again.

Can you think of maybe why it's come back? Has there been a particularly stressful event/period in your life recently?

Try not to let the anger eat away at you hun but channel it in order to cope with the anxiety. I have been angry and just cried because I get so fed up with my head and what it tells me sometimes. But then I take hold of the anger and tell myself that this thing wont beat me, and I'm going to work through it.

Positive thinking definitely helps and you are stronger than you give yourself credit for so dont think you cant do it.

xxxx

[maxine]

Thank you for your replies

Bluebell- I am afraid that I just don't have any fight left in me for this, It was so hard to overcome it the first time, was that it, my taste of a normal life.

Joy- I was under alot of pressure with working full time, doing my NVQ and learning to drive so I think that might have had something to do with it coming back, I was just so happy at being able to do stuff again I wanted to do everything and not waste anymore of my life.
As for meds I was off of them for 8 months before I started having attacks again, I didn't need them anymore . I'm back on a different kind now and have been for 2 1/2 months but i'm just not feeling any better if anything it's getting worse.

Lilith - I'm not sure where to start I try to say to myself " right that's enough of this" I'm going to do this or that and when the time comes to do it i back out.

I mean like my other half wants to take me to New York for Valentines Day ( we went to Paris last year) and at first I got aqll excited but then i started thinking If i can't handle going to dinner in our local how the hell will I manage an 8 hour flight plus all the activities you do in New York! I've told him I don't think i could do it and i don't want him to waste money on taking me if i ruin it by being anxious all the time.

It's taking over my life again and i just don't know what to do.

[joy]

what meds are you on and what were you on before

joy

[kate]

Awww Max

I would imagine it's the stress you've been under that is behind this.

Try to turn your negatives into positives, yes this sounds impossible but it does in fact apply to each and every feeling/reaction that we have.

You have turned your life around before, you CAN get out of this negativity (says me that is STILL anxious after 25 years! ).

Hoping things improve for you real soon, Max

Love Kate xx

[Alisonj]

I feel the same way. Almost everynight I go to bed saying to my husband that I just want to get better, feel better and be normal! I am frustrated as well because I had a long period of time where I was ok and now I am back to square one.
The way I am trying to deal with things is by living in the now. I "try" not to think of the past or think to far ahead but just live in this moment. I do believe we all will get better it just may take some time and some bumps in te road to get there.
Lots of hugs!