Rant Warning
I'm usually pretty quiet, only made a post or two, pop into chat a few times a week, but this was just a bit much. I first showed up here http://www.nomorepanic.co.uk/showthread.php?t=25647 More than 5 GP's, multiple emergency room trips, and even an ambulance trip, I finally found a (another) new GP who found finally started acknowledging the problems, and the damage is pretty wide spread. Thyroid and other blood tests came back high again (they had before but other doc's said it could still be seen as normal) so they wanted to do some ultrasound and (more) X-rays. That day I was diagnosed with liver disease, Hyperparathyroidism, along with finding the (obvious) severe system wide inflammation, and bone/joint abnormalities. They are still taking tests for a damage assessment. The inflammation is so bad, they won't even work on my back or other joints in fear of making things worse. Even over dosed (under doctors supervision) on blood thinners, and on another prescription pain medication, and on a diet thats so strict it allows for almost nothing but water and bread. I hurt so terribly bad everywhere sometimes I can't get out of bed on my own, let alone walk or use stairs.
This all came out about 2 weeks ago, after almost a YEAR of being ignored, and told it was anxiety, panic, in my head, whatever. Even the doctor I have now gave me the "Wow if you had came to me sooner, we could have fixed you up faster". Now they think everything is still treatable, but it will take up to 4-5+ weeks to even start seeing if theres an improvement. I don't understand how all of this was missed before by all the other doctors, even with some of the tests coming back positive. I can't ever remember being this mad. I really just want to go visit my last GP who made me take therapy and just burst in her office and yell and scream till I have a stroke.
And now I feel so incredibly sad and broken. With all the doctors telling I was fine, no one believed me and everyone, even my own family thought "it was all in my head". There was no one to share the victory with, that stuck with me and believed in me. And now that I know theres problems, it makes things worse. Before when I'd have a prolem, like when my heart would start beating so hard it'd hurt and I'd feel faint, and you could clearly hear the "THUMP THUMP " against my chest (this would last about 30s, even my girl friend could hear it) I could try to just tell myself, "Ah, that damn adrenalin." or whatever. But now when it happens I think about all the problems with the thyroid and stuff, and medications I'm on with the warnings about strokes and heart attacks, and it's just worse, arg. Kinda feel like before I was yelling and screaming that there was a scary evil clown in front of me with a large knife, and everyone told me to relax, just anxiety. And now they're like, "Oh yeah, he sure is scary and evil, and that knife sure is big, but relax! He's still a few steps away".
Anyway, this is longer than I ment it to be, and theres probably other stuff I ment to say, but I'm just in so much intense pain from the spirit out and so damn P.O.'ed, I just had to vent somewhere. So now that theres things wrong, what am I suppose to tell myself when I'm having a new severe pain, day long dizzy spell, or any other type of new symptom? Why the hell couldn't they find this stuff when I started complaining almost a year ago?!
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