hiya,
i live every day thinking ive got cancer of somewhwere, and im going to die and leave my kids and get so scared that the world going to carry on and i wont be here, so scared of being told ive got cancer etc.. know this is a common fear on here but i just want it to go.. used to get it years ago badly but got betta, remember i used to be convinced i was going to dye when i was young too. think that maybe down to a violent stepfather who used to threaten me with kingdom come when he was hitting me,i get referred to my cpn with my anxiety, when i go to docs but to be honest i havnt really told him the extent of my fear case they dont take me seriosly when im ill( if you know what i mean) tho he is a lovely doc and has been great with me since my nerves bad after dad died which is what has triggered all this up again! he died from lung cancer suddenly(my biggest fear!) dont know who i ask him to be reffered to as my cpn just says i worry to much!! sorry for rambling im just so fed up of bein like this.silly things like my back and tummy aching and i did a likkle dribble!! when i coughed, instead of thinking, hey, i was lugging 10ltr bags of compost and bags of stone last weekend!! ( i was ) my oh just laughed and said your gettin on babe!!(nicely) know hes right, it think oh god ive got, back, kidney, bladder cancer!!!
becca xxx