I feel like have a general moan about anxiety because I am totally peed off with it! On sunday I felt I could go anywhere, I felt good, but then on Monday I felt totally anxious. Why does that happen? I feel life is flat and I am scared of anything that could make it exciting. I am really happy to come off the anti depressants (I am about half way through coming off them) as I am hoping it will give me some feelings of excitement and lust for life back, but at the same time I am scared about coming off them as I feel my anxiety has increased.

Grrr above all I am frustratefd with myself for feeling like this!

I think I am particularly anxious at the moment as I have loads of things coming up and don't know how I am going to cope with them. Can anyone shed any light?

The things I am getting anxious about are the things I used to look forward to:

1. Next week it is my brithday I have organised to meet up with about 20 friends in a pub. Then on sunday I am going to a Spa with my mum in Covent Garden. I know that sounds lovely, I am looking forward to it but feeling anxious also.
2. The following week I am going to Kent to see my boyfriend's parents.
3. At the end of June I am going to Belgium to a festival with my boyfriend and his friends. This time last year I went to a different festival in Belgium and was so anxious, i had loads of panic attacks and was counting down the days until we left. I took valium through the event.
4. The weekend immediately after I get back from the Festival I am flying to Holland on my own to see my friend for her birthday, this is the thing that totally terrifies me. I need to get a train to stansted, then the flight, then a bus to the train station in Eindhoven, then a train to Utrech. All on my own.
5. In September I am supposed to be starting a MSc degree.

I am scared of relapse.