scared - first day of work tomorrow!

[LisaS]

hiya..
after being off work and uni for 2 months with anxiety followed by depression and a switch of meds from prozac to efexor, I am going for my first day at work tomorrow!!
I haven't interacted with people for so long I think i've forgotton how to! luckily its a boring temp job at my local hospital where i see my CPN - so I guess I can always go see him if it gets too much!
I've been on the efexor for 11 days now and today is the first time I've felt strangely calm and not panicky or anxious.. It makes me feel quite dubious as i've not felt like this in a long time and I wonder how long its going to last.. I have a terrible habit of 'testing' myself to see if those negative thoughts are still there, 'what if i have a panic', 'what if i start feeling suicidal', 'what if i die of something' etc etc.. I think i've been obsessed by these thoughts for so long, its hard for them to disappear overnight.. I'm trying so hard to accept this as maybe the start of my road to recovery but can hear my inner chatterbox trying to convince me there is no hope for me.. I wish it would just bugger off.. sorry, I'm just venting really.. thank you for reading..
love and wishes to all on this wonderful site.
Lisa
xxx

[Meg]

Lisa,

We shall be wishing you well for your first day at work ..
Take a pack of comforting things with you like rescue remedy
, lavender oil to sniff

Hope it goes well



Meg
www.anxietymanagementltd.com

Watch your thoughts, they become your words...
Watch your words, they become your actions... Watch your actions, they become your habits... Watch your habits, they become your character... Watch your character, it becomes your destiny...

[henri]

hey lisa,
good luck tomorrow! i am sure you will be fine - as you say, at least you know that medical help is close at hand if you really need it! you won't though, you will be fine. 'what if' thoughts are such a nightmare - i'm always struggling to banish them from my mind, but hopefully you'll be so busy adjusting to everything at work that you won't have time to think.
take care,
henri x

[turtlemoon]

Hi Lisa

I've totally been where you are now, starting a new job and all that, and all I can say is try not to worry. I know right now it probably seems really daunting and you're probably sitting there wondering how the heck you're going to communicate with people, what they're going to think of you etc, but hopefully it'll be fine.
As for you're anxiety, you've realised the most important thing - you or rather your brain, has been so obsessed with these thoughts and feelings it's hard for them to disappear straight away. But, if you're anything like I was, when you return to work (for however long it might be) it helps to keep you busy. So although the thoughts are still there, they're at the back of your mind rather than the forefront because you've got other things to think about.

I wish you all the luck in the world and remember - you work to live, not live to work. Don't go pushing yourself and only do as much as you feel you can achieve.

Best wishes
Turtle

[carlin]

Hi Lisa,
Well done on your progress and good luck for tommorow, i'm sure you will be fine, as suggested take a few comfort things with you, but just try to relax and enjoy, you'll soon get back into the swing of things, and eventually all the what if's, what will happen etc... will disappear, as you say you have had negative thoughts for quite a while, and they will not disappear overnight, but they will go eventually. Once again good luck, take care and keep us posted.....

[vernon]

hi lisa. good luck with the job tomorrow hope everything goes well

[LisaS]

thank you so much for all your kind words and advice. I have already put dear old dr bach in my bag ready!
I will post when I get home tmrow and let you know how it went!
Lisa
xxx

[clickaway]

All the best for tomorrow Lisa!

That's great news, and I know how you feel. I had a 10 month break off work and returning was not easy, although I did have the comfort of going back to my old job with all that brings with it.

Glad you packed the Remedy

Ray



Don't wait around for other people to be happy for you. Any happiness you get you've got to make yourself.--Alice Walker

[nomorepanic]

Good luck for tomorrow.

Don't forget some breakfast in the morning to set you in good stead for the day.

Hope it goes ok


Nicola

[J9]

Hi,
Good luck tomorrow.
I went back to work after having 5 months off about 3 years ago. I felt worried and at the time I was on Efexor. I managed it, got through it and I'm still there. I'm not great but I overcame a hurdle and like it says in the information on this site, the more you do something the less it becomes a fear.
Everyone here will be thinking of you.
x
PS I always try to think that there are probably other people around me who suffer with the same and this helps.