DAY 4 -Am i over the worst?

[scrumpy78]

last time i seem to remember feeling worse about day 3/4 of the first week on 20mg. im on day 4 of first week of 10mg, am i over the worse? is the first few days the worse or does it continue into days 5-7 ish? i'm just trying to countdown to help me through it. i keep getting waves of panic, nausea, cold sweats and feel like my chest is really tight. Am i on the home straight? oh and when i move up to 20mg in two weeks will i feel this all over again?

[oldhandatthis]

you have to give it a couple of weeks I'm afraid. I had similar symptoms and they came back when the dose was upped. But, by reading posts on here I was able to grit my teeth and get through it. its really awful enduring the feelings of anxiety and nausea I know but at least feel reassured that it WILL get better.

Best of luck.

[scrumpy78]

mm i'm wondering whether to ask doc if i can start 20mg sooner then. i dont mind going through this knowing theres an end , but feel pretty despair at the thought of going through it again in another two weeks!

[DeeperDown]

I don't know anything about restarting (as my other thread will testify), but I know a fair bit about moving up through the doses. I started on 10mg, moved to 20mg and then 40mg and during one nightmare phase went right up to 60mg.

I would say this. In my own experience starting the drug was the worst part. Yes I will conceed that every upgrade had an effect, but they never lasted as long or were as intense as the initial couple of weeks. You also have to remember that you are on the drugs for a reason, and not all of the things you attribute to the citalopram are actually down to the drug.

I can't give you a definitive timeframe. No-one can do that. But I can be reasonably sure that you are now at the bottom of the pit. And that you are about to start climbing out. It may take a few weeks but it will happen.

Lastly another idea. It seems you are worried about getting back to normal in two weeks and then having to go through this hell again. Can I suggest that if you do feel normal (or much better) after a few weeks at 10mg that you very slowly increase your dose so as to virtually negate the side effects. At one stage I went up in 5mg doses (from 20mg to 40mg) and I felt no increase in side effects at all. I may have been lucky - but it is generally true that if you are able to cope with the increased time to get to your "final" dose, this sort of slowly, slowly approach almost always works well.

Whatever happens keep writing here and letting us all know how you are getting on. For me in particular your posts are so helpful.

DD

[scrumpy78]

hey DD thanks for your reply, have you started yours yet? i don't mind being at the bottom of the pit as long as i'm on my way back up. ive been heading down slowly over the past few months and know going back on the citalopram is the right thing to do. let's keep each other updated on our journeys...

[LucyR]

I really can't tell the difference really from being on these to not being on them. They seem to leave a taste in the mouth sometimes, but other than that, I don't feel much difference from not being on them.

[milly jones]

i just upped my dose again today

will let u know if theres any side effects

i would rather be on these than off hun


milly xx

[oldhandatthis]

what dose are you on now Milly?

[andrewc]

Hi Scrumpy

Please give yourself some time and space and you will feel great. You will not suffer the same side effects when you step up and if any they will go away quicker. Perseveer and the benefits will be worth it. I stepped up from 20, 30, 40 and after the initial side effects I was fine.

After 8 months I have started reducing and I am now on 20 and still feel great.

Wish you well

Andy

[DeeperDown]

Just to let you know scrumpy I started back four days ago. Stupidly I took a 40mg to start with without thinking(I have 40mg and 20mg to make up my old 60mg dose), but since then I've been on the 20mg doses. So far the effects have been rather odd. I generally have three main areas which define my depression and each of these can be made worse by the side effects of citalopram. The first is the one I find hardest to deal with - the guide on this forum lists it as "ruminating". Having the same thought (a nasty horrible one) going over and over in my head until it drives me down to the bottom and I can't get out. I lock on to that thought and it tortures me. I hate that effect with more passion than anything else in the world. I feel I should be able to drive it out of my mind, but I just can't do it. The second effect is "complete loss of emotional control" - by which I mean that I cry, weep, can even be physically sick even when I am not thinking of anything. Its just there. There is no reason and I can't regain control of my own emotions. The third is intense physical shaking and loss of muscle control.

I expected my experience this time to be the same as the past times I have "upgraded". When all three effects becoming markedly worse, but that hasn't happened. Instead I have had varying degrees of severeness with each. The ruminating effect is bad when I wake - gets worse for a few hours after I wake - and then I regain some control around evening time. The shaking effect is more severe than I have ever experienced before. I wake up literally spasming. It takes me ten or fifteen minutes to control myself. I just hang on under the sheets until it eases up. However most oddly I don't seem to be suffering the loss of emotional control at all. I was awful when I started the tablets but already they appear to have done something about it. I cry certainly, but only when I allow myself to ruminate, in other words when I've driven myself to it with nasty thoughts.

Overall its better than I expected. In the past I wouldn't have been able to come online or type. Certainly not at this time of the day. So either I am being lucky - or I have yet to feel the complete dive.

It might help you scrumpy to break down the symptoms of your depression as I have above. And monitor each one separately. You may find an encouraging sign in doing so - which is what I have managed to do.

I'll keep coming to your threads when I am online. And letting you know how I am getting on. And the first thing I'll look for when I log on is you telling me how you are getting on. We'll make it.

DD