Since the age of seven I have been subject to a strange experience that, at the age of eleven, was diagnosed as petite mal seizures. Over the thirty two years since then I have been told by doctors and neurologists that I must have some form of epilepsy. I have had EEG, EKG, brain X-Ray, CAT Scans, etc but these have shown nothing wrong. My blood sugar, thyroid , etc have been checked.
It never occured to me to look into the possibility that these are panic attacks because I thought panic attacks were limited to extreme physical symptoms of fear. When I happened upon a link in an epilepsy site that said "feelings of unreality" it brought me to a panic attack page. Wow. It seems to me that I have found an answer at last. I am not yet fully convinced, but I hope that I soon will feel confident that these episodes are panic attacks. What do those of you who are knowledgeble about Panic Disorder think? I would be so happy to hear from anyone who has a similar experience- I have never known anyone who had any sort of "unreality" experience (outside of drug users). Here are my symptoms, as best as I can describe them: Foremost, a sudden feeling that nothing is real. I don't know what I am or what anything else is- yet I can fully function and no one around me has any idea something is going on, unless it gets bad and I freak out. I can look at a table and say "that's a table" but it doesn't mean anything to me. We take reality for granted, but when I have this experience- I don't! There is also a different perception of space around me- a difficult thing to describe, but something to do with dimension and/or light. I tend to want to get down on the ground, perhaps to hang on to the earth, although I am not able to do this because of fear. I'm sorry, this is HARD to describe. My fear symptoms, which match the panic attack symptoms with the exception of stomach problems, well, I've always thought they stemmed from the "unreality" feeling, but perhaps not. I have, on these occaisions, a terrifying feeling that I am going to die. Actually, that I am going to completely cease to exsist in any form. I do not experience any loss of consciousness (please forgive the spelling) or any stiffness in limbs. (Epilepsy symptoms). This experience comes "out of the blue" although there are definitely triggers and I have to be very brave not to avoid certain places and activities. Tiredness does seem to be a factor. Interestingly, I spent a year in Northern Europe and had not one attack the whole time. Soon after that I went to Alaska and had severe attacks many times a day. In Mexico /Guatemala for half a year, I had only about three attacks. This, and the fact that they seem to occur more in theSpring and Autumn, led me to consider that an allergy could be triggering attacks, although now I'm thinking probably not. Over my lifetime the frequency and intensity of these episodes hs varied quite a bit. They don't usually last more than a few minutes. I have awakened at night having this experience. When I was young I would grab my mother and scream for help, eventually I learned that egaging my mind could often help to "bring me back" and so I have trained my children to talk to me about something that will make me think. I also carry an interesting book with me if I walk anywhere. Thanks for your time, Sepo
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