Boo Hoo such a bad time at the moment x

[titchjd]

Hiya every1 ..hope you are all well.

as some know Ive had a bad few days ...I feel so anxious again and so depressed ..Ive still managed 2 go 2 work for 3 hrs a day ,but 2 day I woke up feeling sooooo anxious and just went back 2 bed (wasnt at work 2 day )shakin an having them intrusive thoughts of I cant cope ,i cant do this anymore ,Im going back not forward ,I cant go 2 wedding (bridesmaid in Nov )I will have 2 sell my house ,leave my job .and it goes on and on .....I poped 2 chemist and got some rescue remedy spray not sure if it helps but I just feel anything is worth a try at the moment .
Im just scared that Im going 2 go back and hit rock bottom again and I dont want 2 and I am going 2 fight this so I dont but my god its hard work isnt it .

i have let myself down as well as should have had ECG 2 day only at the docs but I just couldnt go felt 2 depressed .ARGHHHH x

Some 1 give me a big kick up the bum and maybe some advice xxxx

[vti2007]

Awww Titch,

You sound like you are having a really bad time. I don't think you need a kick up the bum I think you need some encouragement.

You are going through exactly what I am, same thoughts, same feelings.

You are not gonna it rock bottom again, you have come too far. I know you have got some of the answers 'cos your advice has helped me so much. I also know how it feels when you slide a bit, you forget all that stuff and the negative comes flooding back.

You are right, it is so so hard sometimes and have a big pat on the back for fighting so hard. You have been back to work, you have dealt with last weeks problems. Things are moving forward even if you can't see it at the mo.

Don't beat yourself up about the ECG, I missed an appointment a few weeks back for the same reasons - gotta go again tommorow. You can just go another day when you are feeling better - which you will be in a day or two

Just remember - if you can cope with the taste of Rescue Remedy then you handle anything else that life throws at you

[titchjd]

Thanx very much for your support m8

Ive Pmd u back .....Hope you are still feeling proud of yourself for going 2 work 2 day x

Hopefully In a few days time I will be writing a succes story rather than all these negative posts x

Thanx again m8

[caz303]

Sorry you're feeling crap titchjd xx I know how disappointing it is when you feel like you're going backwards BUT YOU'RE NOT You've obviously come a long way and it's just a hiccup. Keep telling yourself that the anxiety is just a symptom of your sensitized nerves and that you can still function quite normally (even if you feel like you can't).

Take each day at a time and baby steps

[marie1974]

aww titch i know at the moment u feel awful but it will get better hun, you can be a bridesmaid u just in mega panic mode at moment.

we got to see u looking drop dead gorg hun in your bridesmaid dress and u gonna have to post a pic on here cos u will b dead proud of yourself for doing it.

hugs matey im always here xxxxxxxxxxx

[pinkpiglet]

Hey there, you really are having a tough time at the minute but you will come through this. I was a bridesmaid for my friend several years ago and i was dreading it. I kept thinking that i was going to drop out but seen as it was my best friend i felt that i couldnt let her down. The main part i was dreading was the church bit as i have a phobia against those places, It's has if i start to melt! (I'm guessing I must have been a vampire in a past life) and the thought of sashaying down the aisle filled me with great fear. When it actually came to the day, my friend looked sooooo beautiful and I was soooo happy for her that my fears disappeared and i had an amazing day.I'm sure that when it comes down to it, you will relax and enjoy yourself too.
Keep your chin up Titch, you really are a lovely person and i am sending you a BIG FAT SQUIDGY HUG

[titchjd]

Thanx caz and Donna ..i know its my oversensitized state but its so blumin hard whenu feel sooooo low 2 recognise this .....ive spent all day saying its just thoughts its not real but still felt like Poo .

thanx donna but doubt i cud post pics m8 Im way 2 fat and ugly 2 put my pics on here hun ...I really hope i can do it as I feel my m8 gettin v frustrated with me at the moment and that adds more pressure .....I totally understand its her wedding day and its all that is on her mind but I just feel pressured as i havent herd from her at all while Ive been so down then 2 day had message 2 me just going on about wedding and dres fittings etc and not once did she ask how i was ......Im not a selfish person at al but just a little how are you would have helped x
well a thank you reply has turned in 2 a rant haha so will stop now xx

hugs
Titchjd xxxxxxxxxxxx

[titchjd]

thanx so much pink piglet .....so glad u got through yr wedding ..i do want 2 do it but everything scares me 2 death ...having hair and makeup freaks me walking down aisle freaks me being on top table freaks me sitting 4 meal freaks me and the nyt tym freaks me haha so not much I feel calm about lolxxx

How did u cope hun .....i truly feel scared xx

thanx soooooo much 4 reply and loved big squidgy hug so heres 1 back
big squidgy hug

[marie1974]

hey partner u r not fat and certanly not ugly hunny, u r fabaroony and u gonna look lovely. u got to try and not think about it to much and just do it.

big huggles hun xx

[titchjd]

thanx donna ....i know hun just hard at mo darlin got soooo much goin on and goin on in my head i need 2 sort it out .

I realy really appreciate all yr help m8y ...thank you x
I will email u soon xx

big big hugs x
Titch xxxxxxxxx