Even when I win I lose!

[shortstuff]

Sorry in advance everyone!

I posted earlier about how pleased I was to have made half of our school concert. Its been a busy yet productive day. First getting the kids ready to perform, then the event and this evening my British Sign Language first assessment!

I was feeling the best in weeks after getting through what was a tough day - and with a smile on my face!!! Then CRASH, out of the blue I feel as low as ever! I've self harmed again as a result and now feel even worse!!!

I'm trying to find a logical explanation - e.g. is it the wind down to high anxiety gone to the other extreme? Is this just mental exaustion? Perhaps I'm just a lost cause!

I hate living with this illness and want to scream and not stop!!!!!!!

[Karen]

Hi Shortstuff

Don't be so hard on yourself

It sounds like you have coped very well with some very stressful events and managed brilliantly.

I suffer from depression and I also self harm. I think when we are busy, even with anxiety provoking tasks somehow we manage and keep going and it is only when we stop that the depression and low feelings take over again. This low can sometimes result in resorting to familar coping strategies like self harm, at least that's the way it happens with me sometimes.

Go easy on yourself and remind yourself of how well you have done today and all week.

I hope today is a brighter day for you.

Karen x

[Rennie1989]

First of, well done for what you did, it is a great achievement and you need to pat yourself on the back for that!

Secondly, it happens to me too. I achieve something, but with all the anxiety weld up inside it can make me crash. Spend some time doing some activities that you enjoy or treat yourself to some chocolate, a film, a bath or anything alike! Get those endorphins back!

Again, well done for you ackomplishment!