SCARED TO GO TO WORK

[loulou]

Hi All,

I actually work in the city of London about 100 yards from Aldgate station where one of the bombs went off i was soo scared they wouldnt let us out of the office i couldnt leave untill 3:30 yesterday afternoon and then had to go and get on a train home i was having a panic attack on the train but it went after a while i was soo pleased to get home it was so surreal being in the middle of it all two people i work with were on the train one was in hospital but is ok just cuts and bruises and the other escaped un harmed just very shaken up it has left me feeling a bit deprssed and scared i have to go to work monday and get on a train i dont want to but know i have to Im just scared they will do it again.


Lisa

[nomorepanic]

Lisa

I can really feel for you and this is a hard one.

Everyone is telling us to "carry on as normal" but I am not sure how easy that is to be honest.

We are having a meet-up in London soon and I was contemplating trying a tube for a few stops whilst there (cos I hate them) but now I just don't know if I can do it for obvious reasons.

The problem is that if you don't go back and do it then it will become a deep rooted fear and you may never do it again. However, I can truly understand your fears. It is not as though you can tell someone to get a bus instead is it?

Where do you draw a line ?

I would be interested to hear if anyone does any research into how many people actually leave their jobs in London after this cos I bet there are loads.

I am not helping much cos I would feel the same way as you but I think you have to show the strength to do it. Would work let you work from home (if that is possible) for a few days until things calm down.

I am just watching "Tonight with Trevor McDonald" and there are mixed views. Some have gone back on the tube again today and some say they will never do it again.

Nicola

"Nearly all happiness comes into our lives through doors we don't even remember leaving open"

[clickaway]

Hi Lou,

I'm very sorry to hear about your bad experiences yesterday - it must have been exteremly distressing and anyone of our nature would have had a panic attack - it was one of the first things that went through my mind when I first head the news.

I would like you to sit back for a while and think rationally if you can. We all live in a world of risk, terrorist attacks aside. Danger often comes at random and so we just have to get on with life's routine. Millions of others will again be going up to work on Monday, so consider the majority.

Maybe in time your fears will recede, but I can understand all too well how your thoughts are going. Go up there on Monday, and when you come home you will realise that you can do it.

The alternative would be to mope at home which would be worse.

I know its difficult as you will have the station a 100 yards away from you which may well have a police cordon around it as a reminder.

Be Strong,

Ray



Don't wait around for other people to be happy for you. Any happiness you get you've got to make yourself.--Alice Walker

[carlin]

Hi there,
this is a tough one...we had out problems on Thursday (all turned out ok), there was no panic, just fear, and then the next day, i had to wake the family and send them back to work/school, it was advised to do so, if there had been warnings not too of course i wouldn't have. They all coped fine..things are up and running in London again (few exceptions, of course)i feel so bad for the people and families involved , and we have helped whoever we can, but things do return to 'normal'(wrong word) i don't even know what my point is here, but just do what you can, when you can, speak to people about your feelings and fears, everyone feels sad, bad and helpless, keep in touch and take carexxx

[sarah]

Hi Lisa

I too work in London. Wasnt a great day at all was it? (understatement of the century - sorry!)
What spooked me so much was how surreal it was. It was so quiet on thursday. No one around and (those who were just looked shell shocked) all the roads around me were closed off - just loads of sirens whooping every 2 minutes.
Yet Friday was almost back to normal on the streets whereas on the underground there were loads of seats on the tube even though its normally like sardines.
A couple of people where i work didnt turn up on friday because they were too scared but bizzarely enough I went in, made it through the day and even went out for the night in town.
Ive considered giving up my job and working somewhere close to home but ive come too far to give up now. I love my job and im not going to let a bunch of idiots ruin my time.

take care hon,
love Sarah
xx

[loulou]

Hi All,

I'm feeling quite depressed today I cant stop thinking about the terror attacks I feel ok sometimes and then bang it hits me again and makes me feel reallly depressed im scared im slipping back and will go back to how i was before the thing is ive been doing so good lately my cbt counsellor is even thinking of discharging me why does this make me feel so bad i wish i could just be like everyone else and forget about it but i cant im soo scared abut going back to work monday its not even the train that scaring me its going back to my office cause of thursday i wasnt allowed out of it and i was soo pleased to finally get home that going back there and having to spend the day in that office will just remind me too much of thursday i know im being stupid but everytime i think of my office it makes me feel ill and want to cry the people i work with wont really understand which makes it worse cause i dont have anyone to talk to about it my mum and dad dont really understand they just say you have to get on with it which i know is true but im finding it hard.

sorry had to get that of my chest

Lisa

[seh1980]

hi Lisa,

I totally understand where you are coming from. I don't live in London but if I did, I don't know if I could get on a tube on Monday and pretend that nothing had happened. However, as Nic says, if you don't do it, it will just get worse. Is there any other way you could get to work?

Sarah

"Life is too important to take seriously" Corky Siegal

[Kiki]

Hi Lisa,
I can totally understand what you're going through as on Thursday I was on my way to work at Great Portland St on the Circle line, then was evacuated off my tube at King's Cross. I decided to walk the rest of the way and just happened to be walking down the road towards Tavistock Square when the bus bomb went off right in front of me. It was totally terrifying, I didn't know where to turn & just thought another one was going to go off any second & I was going to die. Like you, I'd been dealing really well with my anxiety lately and now I'm worried about going backwards as I feel so scared. I took Friday off work and spent the whole weekend thinking about what had happened, which really upset me. I was so scared of coming into work & having to get on the tube this morning. As the Circle line is suspended I now have to get the Central line in, which I hate anyway as it's so deep underground & always so busy. When I got down to the platform this morning, it was packed & I couldn't face it so had to come back up. I called my work & they sent someone to come & get me, so I have been on the tube once now, but really don't want to have to put myself at risk & through this anxiety every day. I am seriously considering quitting my job & trying to get something locally as I just don't feel it's worth it. I know everyone says that it's a low risk of getting caught up in anything again, but by going into London every day I feel we are putting ourselves more at risk. I don't know what to do either...
K x x

[Meg]

Loulou ,

**i wish i could just be like everyone else and forget about it **

I don't think anyone in the country let alone London is managing to forget about it. Millions of people are continuing to function and go about their business but I don't think anyone who was close by will be able to really put it behind them yet.

Of course it does make each of us think what would we do in that situation.

I'm a great believer in risk minimisation so if I lived in London still, I would be getting myself a smoke hood and a powerful small torch but would be getting back on the tube this week.

Sarah - Well done !!

Kiki- you must have been very near Gareths wife then. Well done for asking for help when you needed it and using it to help you get to work..

I think lots and lots of people will be doing some soul searching and making alternate plans for their working lives.


Meg
www.anxietymanagementltd.com

Your anxiety is the human representation of the pictures that you paint using your many vivid colours of revolving and reoccurring thoughts.
How big is your gallery ?

[loulou]

Hi All,

Thank you for your replies, Well i managed to go to work today and was ok bit nervous this morning but no where near as bad as i thought i would be but tongiht now im home i just feel soo depressed im thinking silly thingds like what is the point of life and with everyone saying things like you could get runover by a bus tomorrow and could get killed on the street by a maniac doesnt help its making me think what a cruel world we live in and how dangerous life really is (im not suicdal or anything) but do feel really depressed. so wish i could sna out of this but i cant

Lisa