Anybody else get stuck on thoughts about going mad?

[kaisersozay]

Hi there,
my first real post really.

Been suffering from anxiety for the past 2 years now (its my anniversary in a few days! lol) Obviously I've had my good days and my bad. During the summer I am seemingly a lot better since I don't have to deal with the dark nights etc, but anyway...

For some reason, just lately, I've been obsessing over going mad. It sounds very stupid I know, but because of my heightened state of awareness, I always notice movements a lot more out of the corner of my eyes. It's rare but sometimes I'd be watching TV and would see a flash, a star out of the corner of my eye. I also suffer from bad floaters but only when going through stress and anxiety.

Now I have managed to get through all my other symptoms but of course when I notice things flashing in my vision I get worried... eyes are obviously involved in the nervous system as well and if it is under attack, you are sure to get floaters etc.

But with hypochondria, I start thinking its a precursor of a bad mental illness, as though those stars and floaters are going to get even worse. It doesn't help when I hear stories of schizophrenics and psychotics on the news etc...

So I guess my question is, does anybody else have these visual disturbances of floaters, stars etc? I remember a quote "Those with bad mental illnesses are unaware of their descent into it"... I guess the fear of going crackers is really trying to force its way onto me for some irrational reason.

[erin31]

I get a great many visual disturbances which are more often than not related to migraine attacks.
Having said that when my anxiety is at it's worse I also wonder if I am going mad.
I just don't seem able to concentrate on anything and find myself very detached, as if I am not in control. This is where my fear of going mad comes from but as you have said, those who do have severe mental illness are unaware of it.
I once told my doctor I worried about going mad and he said something alone those very lines 'no you're not, not if you're worried about it'. I didn't know what he meant at the time but after reading about mental illness it made sense.

[Tomimo]

I get all the visual disturbances that you describe and they are always worse when I'm anxious. It can be really scary, especially when I wonder if my blood pressure is high, whether it's a brain tumour or hallucinations.

I've learned not to panic too much now when I notices them and say to myself "it's totally normal and harmless" - it sounds ridiculous but eventually you will worry less.

T x

[Jellie]

I have had them for a long time, even when i wasn't anxious. I see flashes of colour a lot too. I actually thought my eyes were broken or my brain was earlier on..Though i am more spiritual now so have my own explanations for them.. but i'm not sure a scientist or a doctor would agree. But then we are all different for sure. xx

[KK77]

I have had them for a long time, even when i wasn't anxious. I see flashes of colour a lot too. I actually thought my eyes were broken or my brain was earlier on..Though i am more spiritual now so have my own explanations for them.. but i'm not sure a scientist or a doctor would agree. But then we are all different for sure. xx

It's hard to describe but I 100% agree. When I started to get odd sensations like these other odd things started to happen in my life...

[kaisersozay]

I get all the visual disturbances that you describe and they are always worse when I'm anxious. It can be really scary, especially when I wonder if my blood pressure is high, whether it's a brain tumour or hallucinations.

I've learned not to panic too much now when I notices them and say to myself "it's totally normal and harmless" - it sounds ridiculous but eventually you will worry less.

T x

Good point, and I guess its an educational thing, where I really find out what mental illness really is, but its hard for me to read up on it when this anxious!