16 months of this - please help!

[screddie]

Hi all - first post! About 16 months ago i went to the doctors very concerned about a pressure feeling in my head which started a few weeks after my gran died (which i witnessed). The doctor said it was anxiety but ordered blood teststo be sure; they were all clear! However, i got extremely anxious about it and thought it was getting worse - i was convinced something was seriously wrong.

I have never been the same since and haven't felt 'normal' for a over a year now. The symptoms never stop and i go from thinking i have one disease to the next - MS, Parkinsons, a brain tumour (although i think i'm over this one now as i'm still standing 14 months later) I have no control. It comes in waves of intensity but never fully goes. It doesn't react to any form of external stress and/or anxiety - just comes on unprompted even when i am quite happy and relaxed. I have had 4 blood tests during this year, all of which are clear. My doc doesn't want to do more tests as it 'will only fuel my anxiety and confirm in my head that she thinks something is wrong' - she doesn't. I have seen a physchiastrist who has diagnosed GAD and put me on sertraline 100mg. However, i have always felt the doctors just tow each others line.

Right now i am in another completely unprompted episode. The last one sent me to the docs with extreme pressure feeling/head pains and pressure behind my eyes - i thought it must be a brain tumour. Right now the shaking has got bad and seems to come on following any sort of light exsertion/use of my muscles. I feel wiped out. Of course i am now back to MS again! No one wants to listen anymore but i only have a tolerance threshold so high before i can no longer just tell myself it's anxiety. It feels so wrong - i just can't accept it isn't something physical.

Sorry for the long post (this is an abbreviated version i assure you!!!) - please help. Any advice would be very helpful. I really dont' know what to do. I just foresee this going on forever.

[countrygirl]

Screddie I do sympathise - I have had awful pressure feelings in my face mostly behind nose and left side of cheek but also top of head and back for nearly a year. I have even had a mri scan of my brain and all my head to make sure nothing nasty in brain or sinuses ears etc and nothing.
I do have problems with my neck in that I have herniated disc and arthritis which gives me very strange sensations in my head and face and apparently even anxiety can cause the neck muscles to tense up enough to cause similar sensations.

Is your neck tense or achy??? This may be the answer.

On one hand I can understand your Dr saying tests don't help health anxiety as I have spent my life staggering from one set of tests to another as I have loads of symptoms daily - some from genuine medical problems but most probably from anxiety. If you think it would help you to have a mri then you can pay for one yourself via your gp referral wich won't cost the nhs anything and I got mine for £250 so they are not impossible to afford. You may want to do this for your peace of mind but as you say after 14 months if it was anything nasty you'd know.

My presssures come suddenly and are intense but only last for a few seconds - I also get crawling sensations in scalp and down side of face always on same side as pressures. I have days where I have it on and off all day long then can have days or weeks at a time where I hardly notice it.

[Redrainbow]

I went through similar things Screddie, test after test nothing found, two years this went on, then it turned out it was depression causing it all. Take it from me you are not alone. If it's any help things have to get better for you sooner or later. Your not on your own i'm on a bad day too today. If all your tests say your fine, your fine, physicaly anyway. I hope you feel better soon. Regards Wayne.

[maz55]

Hi

i like you suffered with similar probs for about 2 years, I know it is very difficult to accept that it is anxiety, and sometimes we just want the doc to say yes its anxiety and here is something to magically take it away instantly, it was'nt till I realized that they could'nt that I managed to get it under control. (well most of the time). I started to listen to a positive CD as I was going to sleep, went to a Tai Chi class, and went and got put on Citalopram, all of which helped, but it took time & effort on my behalf I had to keep muttering positive messages to self to myself, and when it was really bad, would put a sing along Cd on and sing away, it all helped.If the doc has put you on tablets they will take time to work, so bear with it, you can feel better, but there is no magic pill, Hugs Maz

[screddie]

Thanks very much for your quick responses. I have been trying my best to accept what the professional experts are telling me. However, in trying to find answers i do look on google, which i know is a mistake. I see very similar symptoms for the things i am worried about - and that is scary.

I have read a lot about anxiety becoming subconscious in GAD sufferers. As a result your body doesn't regulate the anxiety response properly and you are constantly flooded with andrenaline etc. However, i still find it hard to accept the symptoms i'm getting as being 'just anxiety'. This shaking thing is really scaring me. I wouldn't mind if it was light trembling, but of course it isn't, it seems worse and i am convincing myself it is getting worse and i have MS. My parents and family say don't be ridiculous and the doctors haven't even entertained it. Why would i shake that badly after a short walk or carrying some shopping home etc - it doesn't seem right!

[countrygirl]

I have one hand that trembles when I hold my arms out - its always the same one and I have had it for 20 yrs! Plus do you get the twitching muscles/nerves - I go through very long episodes of this usually affecting my thigh muscle or eyelid or even my mouth - I have had it in most parts of my body to be honest. I once had a twitching thigh muscle for 6 months on and off all day long and it got worse if I exercised. A dr told me its pure anxiety ( my mother was terminally ill at the time) and he had a bad attack of the twitches for a year after he frist qualified as a Dr and whenever he had been stressed even when he didn't know it and he was approaching retirement age.

One thing a neuro told me was that if you have any serious neuro disease then you get actual loss of use of a limb say so you will find it hard to walk because a leg won't work properly etc which is totally different from weird feelings or trembles that do not affect the working of your leg say.

Hope this helps

[countrygirl]

Forgot to say just to make you smile I hope - I had a friend who I worked with who had severe health anxiety ( was only time mine improved!) and she went to our GP because she felt as if she was shaking and trembling all over all the time and our gp laughed and told her to take the batteries out of her vibrator - in those days he could get away with saying it
he did explain it was all anxiety but did we laugh.

[screddie]

Thanks very much, Countrygirl. That really is good to know. That is also rather amusing that the GP said that - certainly does make me smile ! Although, if nothing else i guess that illustrates how easily recognisable these symptoms are to GPs. He wouldn't have joked about it like that if he suspected anything more.

What you say does really help actually. And yes i have frequently had twitching, 'brain zaps'/jolts and other similar nerve sensations. Again, all over my body - lips, eye lids, legs, arms, scalp etc. My sleep quality/pattern has also completely changed since this has started - it is no where near as good now.

I don't know if you have seen this, and i am well aware of the sales pitch going on, but the anxiety explanation is what has made most sense to me so far, particularly in relation to why anxiety attacks/symptoms occur when you aren't anxious and without a trigger - http://www.anxiety-usa.org/ Things like this make sense to me. No doctor has been able or willing to provide an explanation like this.

Thanks again!