Hi everyone my name is Bell and I just wanted to say hello & thank you for the reassurance I've already got from this site!

I'm 36 and first started having panic attacks after the birth of my 2nd child six years ago. I was terrified and quickly got to the point where I hated being without my husband or mum with me and was beginning to feel agoraphobic. After a handful of trips to A&E convinced I was dying, my doctor gave me Effexor which I was on for 4 years.

I came off Effexor myself once I found how addictive it was for me and how bad many of the side-effects were with electric buzzing in my head, insomnia and some very bad bouts of depression. Once I had come off Effexor I had 18 months with no real anxiety. However about a year ago my mum was admitted to a nursing home suffering from Alzheimers and my dad became very ill through alcoholism. This was really stressful and the panic began to return. My dad died suddenly on Boxing Day and my mum died in June - so it's been a tough year. The result has been a real increase in my panic levels to far worse than they were before.

After a few trips to A&E with what was panic I was also found to have gall stones and diabetes type 2. The diagnosis of these combined with my anxiety seems to have turned me into a hypochondriac and now I find it hard to accept that I may have something like a common cold - I panic and assume it's a symptom of something much more serious. My doctor isn't very understanding at all and wants to just manage me by offering Effexor again but I'm very frightened of going back on it.

I've been reading this site for a few weeks and it has helped me so much - I've managed to log on when feeling like I'm about to die and you have stopped me feeling so alone. My husband is very understanding and I'm very lucky because he sat with me last night until 3 a.m. talking me down from a serious attack where I was certain there was no oxygen reaching my body and that I was going to die and not see my children grow up.

Sorry this is a bit of a long introduction but hello!