Relationship is over

[Karen]

Hi Heather

I am glad you were both able to sit down and have a chat about things and work out what is and isn't working.

It can be hard for non-anxious/depressed people to understand what it is like for us. Have you tried giving him some information from the home pages here to read?

Are you receiving therapy at present? If so, would you boyfriend go with you and speak to your therapist with you to gain a greater understanding.

There is also Relate if you think some joint counselling might help.

I hope it works out for you.

Karen



Happiness is not a state to arrive at but a manner of travelling.

You only live once, but if you do it right, once is enough ~ Christine Cagney, Cagney & Lacey

[heths]

Thank you Karen for your reply. There are some good suggestions there.

I'll ask him if he wants to look at info on the site.

I am having therapy, my therapist has spoken to him a couple of times, but she has said that her main focus has to be me and that she has alot of people to see also. My boyfriend did see a councellor some time ago but the councellor talked about my boyfriends money problems he had at the time and his job. But it's worth asking my therapist again if there is anymore help she could suggest for him.

Relate is something I've considered. It's a bit difficult at the moment because of my problems going out, but when I can get further, if things are still like they are now, then I'll consider it.

Thank you,



Heather

[chucklehound]

Hi Heather, hope everything works out for you...

[pips]

I to hope everything works out for you hun.

Take care,

Love PIP'S X X

[ollie35]

Hi Heather,

I know how you are feeling. It is very hard for a partner to understand how we are feeling, they can just become frustrated as they just want to be with the real you.
I used to say "please don't put pressure on me to do anything or judge me, there is no one who wants to be better more than myself, so please give me the space to recover".
Luckily this was given to me and I had no pressure to be something I was not at the time. Heather you will get there, but as it was mentioned above, don't put yourself under any stress about this. YOU are the most important person here, you and your health, so talk and maybe just ask for some support.
You may decide on another route, but at the moment you and the way you are feeling comes first, so please don't stress yourself out whatever the outcome.
My life is so different now to the dark days I went through and yours can to with the help and support you receive on here, the more you learn the easier things can become.

Take care
Paul

[heths]

Thank you Chucklehound, Pips and Paul. Everyone's been so kind thank you.

Paul, you're right it is hard for a partner to understand how we are feeling and he does just want me to be better and does get frustrated. I know that what's behind the arguments is him wanting me better and him caring about me. I have to try to remember that. Thank you again for your reply.

So far we've been spending this weekend together and we had another talk yesterday morning. I had a go at explaining and suggesting a few things, some were ideas from the replies i've had, and so far things are good. We haven't had an argument since. So I'll see how it goes.

Thank you everyone for your replies, really appreciate it,

Take Care,




Heather