My Story - By Andrew
I'm New :O Anyone Out There ! Hello NoMorePanicI'm Andrew and I suffer badly from Panic & Anxiety :( To all other's it's not nice is it :'( I written a story 4u x
The Story of Panic & Anxiety -by Andrew
Hello there, my names Andrew. You’re probably reading this story for two reasons, one you are suffering from panic & anxiety or want to understand what people think when they are having panic & anxiety attacks. To shortly say it’s not a pleasurable experience, panic & anxiety can cause great fear in a person it’s an episode of intense fear or apprehension that is of sudden onset and may occur for no apparent reason or as a reaction to an identifiable triggering stimulus (as a stressful event) specifically: one that is accompanied by usually four or more bodily or cognitive symptoms (as heart palpitations, dizziness, shortness of breath, or feelings of unreality) and that typically peaks within 10 minutes of onset. In some worst cases panic & anxiety may last all day or even years. Any person will get panicky it’s natural for us human beings to panic now and again, it’s away for are human body’s to deal with things such as stressful events. You can also get panicky in pleasurable situation such as going on a roller-coaster. Many people who suffer from panic & anxiety will think that they have something more serious such as a brain tumour or a life threating illness, remember people who are going through panic & anxiety are not going to die because of it. Panic & anxiety is mostly physiological and can be dealt with over time by help from family or help from counselling or even yourself. In the next part of this story I’m going to explain how i felt when going through panic & anxiety from day 1.
My names Andrew as you know I’m 19 years old and i study at college in Devon and i also really suffer badly from panic & anxiety. Let’s just say my life hasn’t been easy, I’ve been fostered for the whole of my life and have moved from one home to another bonding and breaking relationships in the way. I’m now living by myself and have hat to learn the hard way you could say. When getting used to living independently it can be tough so it doesn’t help when you suffer from panic & anxiety. I’ve been living by myself for just over 6 months now and i can say on i positive note that i can manage by myself with budgeting, shopping and paying the rent and electricity bills and so forth; kind of feels weird though I’ve always been around people when living. My social life could be better but I’ve never felt that I’ve fitted in anywhere like a jigsaw piece that’s broken but what’s more annoying is the increased amount of panic & anxiety that has happen to me over the past 6 months. The first day was like any other day went to college studied hard (going on Facebook) and come home to make tea for myself sit down and watch a bit of TV followed by a couple of hours of coursework (more Facebook). That you could say is my common day.
My panic & anxiety started just by feeling a bit strange for the odd minute, i didn’t think about it too much and just carried on. The next day around the same time i felt the strange again i just thought that i was having a busy week and needed an early night; us teenagers don’t go to bed before 11pm but we do need are sleep really. The following days i felt it more, my heart would beat faster and i would feel shaky and tensed. To ease this i got a cup of tea and sat down and watch TV after about 5 to 10 minutes i would feel better. A couple weeks later i was still suffering from these odd episodes of panic and it got worst one night my heart was beating so fast it felt like it stop i was sweating and shaking with palpitations from head to toe and found it hard to breath; at this point i though something must be wrong with me, how can a physiological symptom affect me that much? It was 2oclock in the morning i didn’t want to wake anyone but i had to, the fear was so intents i run down the stairs and franticly knocking on my neighbours door. He opened the door half awake; i rushed in and had to say what was wrong with me. Over 5 to 10 minutes of talking to him i calmed down and said sorry for waking in on you i did my best to keep myself under control but it was just too much, the panic was over i went back to my flat and went to bed. The next day i thought to myself i need to talk to my social worker i explained what happen and she recommended that i should go to the doctors and explain how i feel.
I went to the doctors and he said you have panic & anxiety disorder he recommended counselling and to take a drug called Propanal (a drug that calms you down if you have a sudden attack) for now. I went home and over the following days whenever i had a panic attack i would take one, i did this for about a week the propanol didn’t do much to calm me down so i went back to the doctors and said it’s not working so he suggested to take a drug called Fluoxetine/Prozac (antidepressant drug and is also used for bulimia nervosa, panic disorder and premenstrual dysphonic disorder). As again i went home and tried the drug it’s been over a week now i can say it must be doing something to me although i feel the side effects such as feeling or being sick, diarrhoea, headache and sleepiness, dizziness, weakness, difficulty concentrating and confusion. Yeah you’re probably thinking i don’t want these on top of my anxiety but over time these medication will work. When taking Fluoxetine/Prozac i couldn’t sleep very well for the past week I’ve been up all night at the moment it’s 03:21am morning. After taking Fluoxetine/Prozac i said to the doctor I’ve been unable to sleep for nights he recommended drug called Temazepam (benzodiazepines/hypnotics, they can make you calm down and feel sleepy the side effects are more anxiety, clumsiness or unsteadiness, daytime drowsiness, dizziness, fatigue, feeling of hangover, headache, light-headedness, nausea, nervousness, sluggishness, and unusual weakness). So these past couple of weeks I’ve been hyped up on drugs and feeling well put it this way shit. My mind is all over the place still and getting worst, there’s a saying “it can only get worst be for it gets better”, let just hope that saying works.
It’s currently the Easter holiday and i will have to go back to college soon i need to feel better because it’s slowly affecting my work such as i feel so bad i can’t go to college this was happing before i taken the drugs when the panic & anxiety got worst. To date i still feel bad, i feel like I’m going mad and i feel like I’m going to die, no one want’s to die but i know that I’m not going mad and that I’m not going to die i haven’t got anything wrong with me I’ve been checked by the doctor, I’ve called the ambulance twice now which i hate doing and they have said I’m fine, blood pressure is normal, pulse rate is fine and that my heart-beat is only raised slightly due to me panicking my physical systems are fine. I tend to panic more since my dear mother has MS (multiple sclerosis a chronic disease of the brain and spinal cord characterized by changes in sensation, visual problems, weakness, depression, difficulties with coordination and speech, impaired mobility and disability). I love my mum to pieces so as any son i want to make her proud and that’s by earning my education and a respectable job.
I can only hope that i can get better and focus on my life; i have a lot to look forward too and so do you. I hope that you have enjoyed reading my story and have understood a little bit more about panic & anxiety. This is my story maybe you could write one too? We all have difference situations this is just mine yours maybe far difference or near same experience but i hope you can relate to what I’m saying. Thanks Andrew.
Here is a written piece on how to deal with the symptoms of panic & anxiety by a forum member Michelle: forum web address: www.nomorepanic.co.uk
Ok anxiety remember is just a physical reaction to the chemical adrenalin that is being overly produced by our bodies, it can produce many nasty horrible feelings , but that is all it can do produce feelings, it’s what we do with them feelings that matters.
So for some of those symptoms try the following:
Shaking hands or limbs - clench the hands tight like a fist, hold it and take a deep breath in through your nose, release the fist as you release the breath out through your nose, by doing this slowly and calmly not only are we releasing the adrenalin that has built up but we are also taking control of our breathing which will calm our nervous down.
Lump in throat or tight throat - if you suffer with this then it is usually because when we are tense we walk around with our tongue permanently place up in the roof of our mouth clenched and tight, and by doing this we immediately tense the throat and jaw area, causing muscle tension, so make an effort to check where your tongue is placed.
Pain in shoulders & neck / headaches - again when tense we walk or sit with our shoulders hunched up around our ears, this causes tension in the neck and head, drop the shoulders, keep an eye on where you hold them and if you feel pain or discomfort when you do this its ok it’s just that your body isn’t used to feeling relaxed given time you will re-train yourself to carry yourself properly and in a more relaxed state.
Palpitations - horrible i know but is yet another symptom of anxiety , we do tend to monitor it when we feel our heart going ten to the dozen and this is where we make it seem much worse than it actually is - try to remember a strong fast beating heart is a good heart and no harm will come to you or your heart, if at night time you struggle to sleep for listening to your own heart when lying down then place to pillows on the bed and rest your head on the crack between the two pillows , this will help you to stop monitoring and listening to yourself.
Dizzy or sick spells - again not nice but very common, when we have anxiety we burn off sugar very fast or we don’t eat enough, you should really be trying to eat 4 or 5 small meals a day rather than 2 or 3 large ones and if you feel sick or dizzy then try a sweet cup of tea or a biscuit to help replenish your sugar levels, every symptom you feel has a logical explanation for it and once you discover how to help yourself beating anxiety becomes much easier.
Depersonalization - this is simply a result of a tired mind , when we have anxiety we seem to think about things 24/7 and of course this tires us out , instead of curling up in bed or on the sofa praying this stops simply do the breathing exercise for 20 minutes , doing this will give your mind time to rest and your body time to relax, doing a good exercise for 20 minutes is the same as allowing the body and mind 2 hours sleep well worth doing and i suggest even if you’re having a good day try to do this for 20minutes at least 3 times a day this will allow you to keep your body relaxed and in the state it should be.
Intrusive thoughts - horrible again believe me i been there , but remember these are just thoughts and again it’s the way we react to them that matters , don’t sit there thinking and pondering about the why's if's and maybe's , get up do something , read a book , play a game crosswords or even bake some bread or cakes anything to take your mind away from your thought, it’s impossible to think about two things at the same time, i know it seems you can but trust me you can’t and eventually if you stick with distraction it does work.
Exercise - essential for recovery, try to do some low impact exercises each day it may be a little walk or cycling or even swimming, yoga is excellent for anxiety and good exercise releases the body's own natural endorphins which makes us feel good and happy, well worth doing.
Sleep - we all struggle from time to time with our sleeping patterns , try if you can to stop napping during the day , if you feel you must then be sensible about it , set an alarm and give yourself a hour or perhaps 2 then get up , don’t lie there in a half asleep state thinking about things get up and do something constructive , if you wake during the night and struggle to get back off to sleep again don’t lie there get up , go clean or get a nice warm drink you have to start breaking the cycle and habits that we so easily form when we suffer with anxiety or panic.
Panic attack - ok firstly try to break the cycle of being scared something terrible is going to happen it won’t , running away simple creates more problems and makes us feel a failure , if you feel panic coming where ever you are try this
drop your shoulders , focus on something nearby - a shop window , a lamp post or even a tin of beans if you’re in the supermarket , take a slow deep breath in through your nose count to 4 , release it our again through the nose and repeat , tell yourself its ok it will pass and you will be ok , do this for a few moments then continue with what you were doing , you may feel slightly dizzy or sick , this is ok it’s as a result of your levels returning to normal , take a sweet and suck it this will help with the nausea , anyone who knows me knows i have a constant supply of mints in my handbag for such occasions.
Hope it was ok any feedbackx
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