I can't cope at all, please help

[GirlAfraid23]

My life has taken a turn for the worst lately.

My dear nan passed away a few weeks ago and its her funeral on wednesday. This is an awful situation in itself but it has also kicked off my health anxiety once again.

All I can think about is dying, death and dying in my sleep.

I also keep thinking of other family members dying like my other nan, mum, dad and brother...just the pure thought makes me want to be sick and starts me panicking.

I've been having terrible "bad breathing" sessions, when I can't catch my breath and I feel as though I'm dying.
I'm so tired tonight but I don't want to go to sleep in case I die in the night - how stupid right? I've been having this alot lately, practically every night I lay awake praying that I will see the light of day once again and I'm almost ecstatic each time I wake up in the morning - as though its a miracle.
At the moment I'm worried I am suffering from concussion and I also recently read a story in the papers about a girl who died in the night and she was perfectly healthy otherwise, I'm 21 - 22 next month by the way.

The final thing is that I'm in a relationship with someone I don't even know if I love anymore :( I am terribly in love with somebody else and am almost obsessed with him. I think about him 24/7 and go over the times we shared and the times we kissed etc. I feel sick to my stomach as I haven't seen him in two years and I don't know how I can go on feeling this way with no way of being with him. There are lots of complications and we could never be together - its almost forbidden. Since my nan's death and my new found reflective attitude on life, I feel as though he is the only person who will make me happy so why should I just settle for someone if I prefer another?

Too much is happening and I can't handle it.
I feel as though I'm going to explode

[sun-shine]

My life has taken a turn for the worst lately.

My dear nan passed away a few weeks ago and its her funeral on wednesday. This is an awful situation in itself but it has also kicked off my health anxiety once again.

All I can think about is dying, death and dying in my sleep.

I also keep thinking of other family members dying like my other nan, mum, dad and brother...just the pure thought makes me want to be sick and starts me panicking.

I've been having terrible "bad breathing" sessions, when I can't catch my breath and I feel as though I'm dying.
I'm so tired tonight but I don't want to go to sleep in case I die in the night - how stupid right? I've been having this alot lately, practically every night I lay awake praying that I will see the light of day once again and I'm almost ecstatic each time I wake up in the morning - as though its a miracle.
At the moment I'm worried I am suffering from concussion and I also recently read a story in the papers about a girl who died in the night and she was perfectly healthy otherwise, I'm 21 - 22 next month by the way.

The final thing is that I'm in a relationship with someone I don't even know if I love anymore :( I am terribly in love with somebody else and am almost obsessed with him. I think about him 24/7 and go over the times we shared and the times we kissed etc. I feel sick to my stomach as I haven't seen him in two years and I don't know how I can go on feeling this way with no way of being with him. There are lots of complications and we could never be together - its almost forbidden. Since my nan's death and my new found reflective attitude on life, I feel as though he is the only person who will make me happy so why should I just settle for someone if I prefer another?

Too much is happening and I can't handle it.
I feel as though I'm going to explode

Reading through your post is like looking in the mirror? This is exactly me. I have all the same feeling and for around 3wks now it has completely took over my life! But what iv found in the last 2 days is, we aren't the only ones going through this situation? Like I already said your post is like I wrote it? I too lost my Nana, and its been a living hell. All iv thought about is bad, and how I'm going to die in my sleep or any second of the day? Its like living in absolute fear 24hrs a day.... All classic symptoms of anxiety!

We are not alone in this.... As for the relationship stuff, you may not think it but your anxieties also effect the way your feeling in that department too. once you start to control this anxiety everything else will sort it self out. Take-care x

[KayleighJane]

I could have written both of your posts lol, all of my feelings are exactly the same, i constantly am terrified i am about to die, stop breathing suddenly and die, all the same things as you two have described. Funnily enough I lost my nan also and I think this is one of the main reasons my anxiety has started, Think it made me realise it happens to us all eventually and its scared the hell out of me.

I have bad breathing episodes also, I can see myself breathing but i can't feel it and then start to panic. its a nightmare i am still going through it myself so can't offer much advice but am around if you want a chat.

Kayleigh x

[sun-shine]

I could have written both of your posts lol, all of my feelings are exactly the same, i constantly am terrified i am about to die, stop breathing suddenly and die, all the same things as you two have described. Funnily enough I lost my nan also and I think this is one of the main reasons my anxiety has started, Think it made me realise it happens to us all eventually and its scared the hell out of me.

I have bad breathing episodes also, I can see myself breathing but i can't feel it and then start to panic. its a nightmare i am still going through it myself so can't offer much advice but am around if you want a chat.

Kayleigh x

kjane, isn't it just dreafull! i wouldnt wish it on anyone!... your post is like you've crawled into my thoughs?... i guess thats anxiety for you!

hope your well considering, i basically take each hour as it comes!

take-care X