heartbroken, urge to self-harm, scared

[allergyphobia]

i'm really scared, i have never felt like this before.

i am utterly cut up about the end of my relationship, and i feel like i want to hurt myself. sometimes being dramatic i have said that before but never meant it.

i am at work and for the past 2 hours i have been digging my fingernails hard into my hands and arms.

i'm scared to go home, i'm really scared.

please somebody help x

[ElizabethJane]

If you feel like sh then I think that you need professional help tbh Is there someone you can call? EJ

[snowgoose]

oh sweetheart

now then come here get cuddle ......and let us folk here comfort eh?
You have struggled and won all this year . fact . huge achievement young lady .
But You are still vulnerable of course you are . It takes time and you have been shaken to your core . But still standing .

dont do NOT give in to harming yourself ..distract ......ring friends ,Samaritans .......walk walk .......you are bigger than this demon on your shoulder . you are stronger than you think
You are grieving ..............it is horrible horrible ..........just say to yourself one day at a time . It is all we have when you think about it .
baby steps one foot in front of the other .hold my hand and pm me if you think I can help .
big deep breath lady .........cold water splash on face and neck.....and visualise the life that is rightfully yours with a partner who will love you and not play mind games . He is out there . Honest

now no cutting tonight if you can distract . and ring for help if it gets too bad .
promise me xxxx

xxxxx

---------- Post added at 18:40 ---------- Previous post was at 18:37 ----------

oh sweetheart

now then come here get cuddle ......and let us folk here comfort eh?
You have struggled and won all this year . Fact . huge achievement young lady .
But You are still vulnerable of course you are . It takes time and you have been shaken to your core . But still standing .

DO NOT give in to harming yourself ..distract ......ring friends ,Samaritans .......walk walk .......you are bigger than this demon on your shoulder . you are stronger than you think
You are grieving ..............it is horrible horrible ..........just say to yourself one day at a time . It is all we have when you think about it .
baby steps one foot in front of the other .hold my hand and pm me if you think I can help .
big deep breath lady .........cold water splash on face and neck.....and visualise the life that is rightfully yours with a partner who will love you and not play mind games . He is out there . Honest

now no cutting tonight if you can distract . and ring for help if it gets too bad .
promise me xxxx

[paula lynne]

Hello Gawjus girl x
I have self-harm issues related to my severe PMS.
What helps me is finding somewhere to scream, and I mean scream your head off.

Squeezing a ball or similar also helps.
If the feeling is overwhelming and you do put your hands on yourself, use the flat of your hand not your nails.
I agree that seeing a professional who is trained in this kind of thing is important, because this can escalate very quickly and start becoming uncontrollable. Thats because this is stemming from the end of your relationship, which is still the case, ie, the situation is still there in the morning.

Please ring the Samaritans for help asap tonight. Hold on. Im with you.
Paula xxxxxx

[Deepest Blue]

Sending you 1000 hugs

Thinking of you right now, I hope you're ok x x

[Hazel B]

You've come so far and done so well. This is a huge life change and it's no wonder you feel crap. I like Paula Lynne's suggestion to scream and one thing I do is to go nuts with the punch bag at the gym. I pent up all my anger so it's good to let it out.

Please don't harm yourself, you can get through this.

Lots of strength and hugs.

[allergyphobia]

thank you all for your lovely words and support and for just caring when you all have your own lives to be getting on with. the screaming is an amazing idea and i'm going to order a stress ball off the internet.

i've never had these urges before, they've been on and off all evening, at points i was fine, could listen to music, cook my dinner, text my friend and be fine. then because we are still living together at the moment i'd get a flash of pain and all i could think was to pinch myself.

i am just worried, as i've never felt like this before. it is a massive life change and i hope it's just the shock and it will die down. i'm definitely going to try the screaming. i am so fed up of feeling unhappy and numb inside and horrible and crying and not wanting to sleep, and then knowing i have to go through all of this again when he eventually moves out.

MEN!

thank you. you're all amazing, far too good for me xxx

[allergyphobia]

i just wanted to say thanks again to all of you for all of your kind words. i have been re-reading them and they really help.

i feel a lot brighter this morning, hopefully i am starting to get some perspective and realise he is not worth me hurting myself over. i'm thinking about going for a drive after work to put on some loud music and do the screaming thing Paula!

i'm really sorry if i upset anyone with my post. i don't want to get into a bad habit with self harm and i'm hoping these feelings will pass asap.

[paula lynne]

Glad you are feeling better today xxx
Enjoy your drive and if the police stop you for causing noise disturbance, tell them "Paula told me to do it!"

Ive posted about self-harm before "Help, Ive cut myself" I think it was called. Its quite graphic, but when you are going through such emotional turmoil and need help, its easy to forget whos reading the posts. Im sure you havent upset anyone hun.

Hope you continue to go from strength to strength x
Love P x

[bluesparkle]

hello
im not sure ive got any advice or can help but i wanted you to know we care...and also ive been in the same situation a few years back.
it was horrid, my relationship broke down and we had to live together for 4 weeks and it was really really hard.
it is awful and you feel like you will never get over it but you will hun.
i relied on nmp and everyone got me through. i have had a few relationship break ups but not like that it was absolutely soul destroying but concentrate on you, put you first at all times.
ive read back some of my posts and i cant believe that was me.
i have my life back now and you will to.
we are all here for you.
rach
x